Telephony's definitions

woodpeckerhead

A woodpecker (sp. Picidae) that, from some angles, its head looks like a pecker (dick, cock, willie, johnson, penus, penis, etc. is known as a woodpeckerhead.

Look at the head of that woodpecker over there! It's a woodpeckerhead!!!

by Telephony April 6, 2015

The Fag March

What some homophobes call, "The Gay Pride Parade", which occurs in many major U.S. cities in June every year {in Seattle WA. it is the last Sunday in June}.

{Homophobe #1): Hey, let's go blow up the Port-O-Lets at The Fag March before that stupid parade begins!
{Homophobe #2}: Great idea! I'll run home and get some M-80s!

by Telephony June 28, 2014

hosed down

Shot with a gun; either mortally or to the point of where the shooting victim is totally incapacitated.

Hey Mike, did you hear that Chris in Juneau got hosed down a couple of days ago?

by Telephony November 28, 2011

douched out on the ice

Having slipped and fallen on a patch of ice.

Ron: Yo man, where ya been?
Craig: Sorry about that dude. I douched out on the ice on the way here.

by Telephony December 6, 2011

flying penis

What some people call a Boeing CH-47 Chinook helicopter (the kind with no tailboom and two sets of main rotor blades located on the upper side of the fuselage both fore & aft; sometimes called a tandem helicopter) because it looks like a big ding-a-ling flying through the sky.

Hey Dennis, check out the flying penis near those buildings over there!!!

by Telephony September 28, 2013

I Need to Hit the Head

A fake, phoney-bologna totally fictional jingle one might sing when they have to use the toilet or urinal.

{Sung to the tune of the nursery rhyme, "The Farmer in the Dell"}:

♫ I need to hit the head, ♫

♫ I need to hit the head, ♫
♫ Don't piss in the stereo ♫
♫ I need to hit the head! ♫

by Telephony April 6, 2017