Telephony's definitions

uronium

Chemical symbol: Un.
Atomic number 327.
An odoriferous brown substance that usually exists between the toliet seat hinges and the bowl.
Uronium may also appear around the bolts that hold the toliet to the floor.

Some people choose to ignore uronium; choosing instead to mask its unique odor with Glade® Plug-Ins® or Wizard™ aerosol.

by Telephony October 24, 2010

battery hog

Another term for, "dry cell pig" -- that is, a battery-operated device that devours batteries like there's no tomorrow.

Man this radio is a real battery hog! I just put a new set of AA cells in there half an hour ago and they're already going down the tube!

by Telephony October 8, 2018

organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound

Plain and simple: milk.
Cow's milk is a liquid organic suspension that comes from a female cow's boobs.

Harry, can you please pick up a jug of organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound on your way home dear?

by Telephony April 12, 2015

woodpeckerhead

A woodpecker (sp. Picidae) that, from some angles, its head looks like a pecker (dick, cock, willie, johnson, penus, penis, etc. is known as a woodpeckerhead.

Look at the head of that woodpecker over there! It's a woodpeckerhead!!!

by Telephony April 6, 2015

asshole thermometer

Another name for a rectal thermometer.

Hey Jerry, don't put that fucking thing in your mouth cos it's an asshole thermometer!

by Telephony May 15, 2016

5th of July

The day when you walk down the street and see things such as sticks from bottle rockets, and remnants of Roman candles scattered in lawns and in gutters, and the occasional "banana peeled" mailbox that got that way because some asshaberdasher shoved a lighted M80 or M500 illegal firecracker into it the night before.

Hey Jimbo, check out that demolished mailbox!
Must be the 5th of July or something!

by Telephony July 3, 2014

urinehead

Somebody who has enuresis (pisses the bed) well past his or her childhood years.

{Dave; at a jr. high basketball game to his 12 year-old stepbrother}: He wets the bed, urinehead!!!

by Telephony April 9, 2013