Tagz's definitions

Expansive Repulsive Disorder

n. Affliction causing an individual to appear reasonably attractive in their facebook thumbnail image, but downright hideous when the same image is viewed full size. Abbr. E.R.D.

Her thumbnail looked really good so I friended her. Turns out she has a really bad case of Expansive Repulsive Disorder.

by Tagz November 23, 2010

precop

abbr. (pre-copulation agreement) A mutually binding agreement (usually verbal) by and between consenting adults prior to engaging in casual sex. The agreement stipulates that all involved parties are excused from emotional attachment, post coital contact, and any promise of future sex. Any and all disputes arising from said contract should be submitted and negotiated through binding arbitration. This agreement must involve a minimum of two individuals, with the maximum number to be determined in practical application.

Q: So, you stud, are you going to call Tina today?
A: No, I believe that would be a violation of our precop.

by tagz February 23, 2008

bedgasm

A feeling of complete and utter euphoria which peaks when climbing into bed at the end of an 18-hour workday, a long road trip or hours of extremely strenuous physical activity. Under perfect conditions, the physical release has been likened to that of an intense sexual experience.

It was a three hour drive in the middle of the night, I could barely stay awake. When I got home, I climbed under the covers and had a ten-minute bedgasm.

by tagz July 29, 2007

said no one ever

Declarative phrase appearing at the end of a statement which effectively negates the meaning of the previously stated text. Essentially, the presence of this statement instructs the reader that what has been stated up to this point is a fallacy in that no one would make that statement under any circumstances, at any time (in the past, present or future) in any corner of the known universe.

I am so tired of bacon that I hope I never have to eat it again. Said no one ever.

by tagz May 1, 2013

Danger Wood

n. The immediate and ridiculously enormous boner that magically appears when it becomes obvious that you are about to engage in sex in a place or with a person (or both) that you shouldn't.

My roommates girlfriend just whispered in my ear that she wants to fuck me now, in the laundry room, while the party is going on. You can't imagine the Danger Wood I got when she said that!

by Tagz November 8, 2011

Capri Cum

n. The small amount of liquid that flies out the top of the straw when first inserting it into a pouch of Capri Sun® Juice Drink.

Can you get me a paper towel? I need to wipe the Capri Cum off of the table.

by Tagz February 24, 2011

Dollar Store

Retail establishment specializing in Party Supplies, Movie Theater style Candy, off-brand or generic items, and potentially toxic Chinese Imports. All items are price fixed at One Dollar US.

Dan's hair is falling out because he buys his shampoo at the Dollar Store.

by Tagz December 30, 2008