Stoney69's definitions

Boogkake

This steamy act unfolds with a man blowing his boogies all over his hoe’s face. If he wants to get extra kinky, the slore will open her mouth and suck up all the boogies while he shoots them out of his nose, similar to a vacuum cleaner sucking up dust.

Stonyus Maximus (SM): Yo brotein Shake, merry Clitmas. How was your ho-ho-holiday?

Big Beefy Queefy (BBQ): Sup asshole, my Clitmas was good. Popped this chick’s cherry and dropped a chocolate rain on her afterwards. Hbu?

SM: Mine was solid. I hit this skank with a pile of Boogkake. Throttled that shit down her throat faster than Kim John Ewn fires his rockets into the sky.

BBQ: You sir are a bonerfide badass. Invite me next time and we can be Boogskimo Bros.

by Stoney69 December 26, 2021

Jittcuzzi Tub of Cumception

A man loads his semen into the jacuzzi jets before turning on the tub. The next unassuming woman to take a relaxing bath will be bombarded with the man’s jitt (hense jittcuzzi). The sloor may later becum pregnant from the jacuzzi jets firing the jizz into her cooch, like that of a cannonball shooting out of a cannon.

Disclaimer: Not recommended in Alabama

Caitlin Jenner: Took a nice bubble bath in my neighbor’s hot tub last night. It was hella relaxing.

Pimp: Bitch, hope you wasn’t in a Jittcuzzi Tub of Cumception. Them shits will get you preg af. Worst thing is, if you is in Alabamer, they gon’ make you keep the baby. Unless you wanna go to jail and get pounded by Sandusky type mofos and shit like that.

by Stoney69 May 16, 2019

Shitbit

Similar to a Fitbit around your wrist, this device goes around your waist. Every time you defecate, it will sense that you are about to excrete fecal matter and will start going to work. With its advanced detection system, this device will calculate the amount of snickers dropped in the punch bowl, total squeezes of the sphincter, and will even detect the development of hemorrhoids during the painful process of squeezing out your piping hot logs. At the end of the week, the device will send you a report of how many dumps you have taken each day. It will also recommend lifestyle changes if you are dropping the kids off at the pool too frequently throughout the week. This device is available for a price of $69.99.

Tyrant: Yo dude, my shits have been crazy lately. The tater tots I ate yesterday legit blew through me like a laxative. I bought a Shitbit to help me track how many times I shit per day and the number is astounding. On average, i shit about 4 to 5 times a day.

Big Easy: Bro you might want to see a doctor about that. It seems kinda unhealthy.

Tyrant: Nah dude, doctors are overrated. That’s why I bought a Shitbit. It recommends specific lifestyle changes and even gives you words of encouragement like Siri does sometimes.

Big Easy: Siri and I had sex once.

by Stoney69 March 6, 2019

Jitt-Skiing

Step 1: Get a slutty chick, 2 horny bros and a jet ski.

Step 2: Position the hoe in between the 2 dudes and start the engine.

Step 3: The gutter slut proceeds to pump both dudes off as they glide across the moist bay.

Tyrunt: Yo bro tryna go jet skiing this summer?

Big Queasy: Nah that’s for geeks. I only go jitt-skiing with my boy and his tranny girl. It’s a hell of a time and we drink Coronas after.

Tyrunt: You’re my bedtime hero.

by Stoney69 April 2, 2020

Dunkin’ Doz Nuts

When your gonads hang so low that they dip into the toilet. If there is poo poo in the toilet, this may be similar to dunkin’ donuts in some black coffee.

Mike: Yo Stone, I was munchin’ on some cream filled donuts this morning. When I bit into one, the cream squirted right into my eye. Shit still stings.

Stoney: Dawg that’s nothing. I was Dunkin’ Doz Nuts during my morning shit like crazy. Had to take 3 showers to fully clean my knackers off.

by Stoney69 January 19, 2019

Prostate-toot-shuN

When a prostitute fiddles with your prostate until you toot, and then you shun her for the rest of the STD bang sesh.

Big Queefy: Yo Boner, I’m tryna hit hooters tonight, you in?

Boney Stoney: First, it’s Boney, not Boner. And second, I’m out. I’m shunning prostitutes rn, I call it prostate-toot-shun. So I’m not down with looking at any Hooter whores tonight. You’ll get multiple STDs just looking at them.

Big Queefy: True, I got Gonorrhea and Crabs just from staring at this Hooter hoe last time. Turns out the crabs were not the food like I thought..

Boney Stoney: Damn that’s hot. Nvm, I’m so in.

by Stoney69 July 16, 2022

Chocolate Rain

A revenge term for when you find out your gf is cheating on you and instead of breaking up with her, you hit her with a chocolate rain. First, you take a bunch of laxatives before sex and make sure you are pounding doggy style. Then, right as you are about to bust your load, you pull out and swiftly hop forward like a kangaroo and cover her head with a concoction of cum and diarrhea. The key is to make sure this all takes place in HER bed and once you are done, you hold up both middle fingers and walk out with a huge smile.

Mike: Dude I had some wicked sex last night, I must’ve busted like 6 times.

Stoney: Bruh, my gf is a total gutter slut and cheated on me with some douchewad. So I acted like I didn’t know and I hit her with the gnarliest chocolate rain. It was glorious.

Mike: Bro.... NICE!!!!

by Stoney69 January 9, 2019