Stoatman's definitions

che guevara

A rather naive Marxist mass-murderer, who carried out Revolutionary "Justice" in Cuba, normally with a pistol to the temple. Drove Cuba's economy into the ground as its head by having a system where supply and demand did not dictate price, but the "social worth" of the item in question. Relished the idea of a global nuclear war between Socialism and Imperialism/Capitalism, and firmly believed that "The People" would be grateful for such a conflict. After falling out of favour in Cuba, he tried to sell himself as a wandering revolutionary in South America, so determined to "help the people" that he wasn't bothered with trifling little details about who they were and what they wanted (he tried to sell a communist revolution to Bolivian natives, who owned their own land and were perfectly happy and therefore told him to sod off). Ended up getting topped in Bolivia by CIA trained soldiers.

Che Guevara is idolised by all kinds of naive students and marxists who are more interested in the myths about the man than what he actually did

by stoatman August 31, 2004

The Nice

Term coined by the lead singer of The Small Faces to describe the feeling when the amphetamines kick in. Became the name of probably the original progressive rock act, formed of Keith Emerson on organ, Blinkey Davidson on drums, Lee Jackson on bass, and Dave O'list on guitar: the forerunner of Emerson, Lake and Palmer (ELP).
Famed for Keith Emerson's stage performances involving serious organ abuse (imagine if Hendrix played the Hammond), throwing it around on stage, setting fire to it, sticking knives in it etc.

"Here comes The Nice"

by Stoatman August 21, 2004

SPAD

Acronym of Signal Passed At Danger: when the choo-choo train enters the tunnel of love whilst ignoring the red warning signs at the entrance.

See also red rooter.

"Well, I 'ad vis bird round ve back of KFC up against ve bins, and she was well up fer it, so in I goes, gave her wat for, got 'ome, took a slash & realised I'd SPAD-ded, ve dirty bitch!"

by Stoatman August 21, 2004

Big Blunkett

Combination of "David Blunkett" and "Big Brother" (from Orwell's 1984, not the trashy TV show!), to illustrate the fact that Blunkett wants us all tagged, DNA profiled, ID'd and watched by surveillance cameras at all times, because of the bogeymen of "illegal immigration", "terrorism", and "benefit fraud".

"Big Blunkett's not satisfied that the UK already has 10% of the world's surveillance cameras, so he's set a 5 year plan and another target to top this"

by Stoatman August 21, 2004

cloggy

A particular breed of human who inhabit an exceedingly flat country bordering on the North Sea. Commonly over 6' tall, sporting a bushy moustache which does nothing to hide their enomous overbite, often seen riding ancient bicycles without due care and attention, and famed for wearing wooden shoes (clogs), from which their name derives. More likely to be on state-sponsored indefinite sick leave than have a job, these animals stack themselves into state-sponsored apartment blocks in the most densely populated area of northern Europe. Often seen in other parts of the world in their caravans, liberally stocked with chocolate sprinkles (to be eaten on bread), Heineken, meat croquettes, and porno mags, shocked that they are above sea level and not quite sure how to deal with the rarified air of the Cambridgeshire mountains. Children and dogs are usually untrained.

"I was on the train yesterday, and some hippy-arsed cloggie wasn't watching her untrainable kids, and one of them got out at a station for a joke and the train pulled away, so she pulled the emergency cord & delayed the train for 1/2 an hour. She couldn't see what the problem was.

by Stoatman August 6, 2004