Staifreak 's definitions

jakey bag

The blue plastic carrier bag that you carry your cheap alcohol home in.

Mate, are you going up the road? Don’t Forget your jakey bag
Awe, cheers mate, I’d be fucked without it!

by Staifreak May 15, 2018

Albert Bartlett

Exceptional breasts.
Taken from the word “chebs” sounding like “chips” used as a code so as not to be caught checking them out.

Albert Bartlett has arrived on table 20.

by Staifreak March 13, 2018

done your nut?

Have you lost your mind?

What’s up with you mate?
Done your nut?

by Staifreak March 13, 2018

johnson’s baby

Someone in a work environment who bursts into tears at any moment of the slightest confrontation.
Relates to Johnson’s “no more tears shampoo”

What is up with Johnson’s baby now?
- Oh, I️ told her I️ couldn’t help her out with a spare bottle of stoli!
- FFS! Again?

by Staifreak March 13, 2018

that’s the one

What Andy says in agreement to almost everything, even If the question is “pint of Guinness please”

Pint of Guinness please Andy.

Andy - “That’s the one”

by Staifreak March 13, 2018

strokepished

When someone is so drunk that you cannot determine whether or not they have had a stroke or have simply had too much to drink.

Me:The woman on table 49 is pure steaming!
Anthony: mate she’s had a stroke.
(Half an hour later) - can’t even punch her PIN number into card machine
Woman on table 49:Shouting “this is a pure disgrace! I’m in retail!”
Me: Told you she was pished!
Anthony: Aye..... STROKEPISHED!

by Staifreak November 12, 2018

Scudders

A name for a bald person taken from the word “scud” meaning naked, a shortened form of “scud nut”

Scudders, scud

by Staifreak March 13, 2018