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Sharkey & Bubbles's definitions

Pillow hat

Can't get comfortable on that flight?

Pillow hat!

Need to rest your weary head after a long day of implipping?

Pillow hat!

Tired from walking around with a pillow hat on your head in the Dragons Den?

Pillow hat!

Pillow hats are the everyday solution to snoozing anywhere (in your old age). A stylish headgear accentuated in a range of neutral earthy colours to meet your "out and about" catnapping needs. It's a solution for that siesta, a facilitator of forty winks!

Patent pending.
Susie could not get comfortable on her flight. She looked on in envy at the Greek gentleman in the turban as he rested his head. Imagine if you packed pillow stuffing into that cloth winding, she thought to herself. That would be some sort of amazing Pillow hat to help me sleep!
by Sharkey & Bubbles August 6, 2022
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Fashion the gash

As a component of do-it-yourself gender-affirmation surgery, to fashion the gash is to create a vajayjay using a 'felling axe'. The axe is delicately balanced on the recipient's chin with the aim for it to fall cleanly, fashioning the new chuff.

Critical components of this operation include the sharpness of the blade, the symmetrical nature of the axe-wound, and the length of the handle. If the axe were to fall short it could risk other features such as "ma belly".
Having spent £6,000 on removing a penis, to avoid a difficult conversation and some discreet tucking on her first evening with Stuart, Susie was prepared for the final stage of her transition. After being reminded that Stuart was indeed her liginto, she headed out to the back garden to fashion the gash.
by Sharkey & Bubbles May 13, 2022
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Tiara week

Ladies don't have sex during menstruation, "It's the difference between a woman and a lady".

No matter how biblical the sex, there will be no parting of the red sea during Tiara week.

Synonyms: Blow job week, Titty wank week

Antonyms: Shark week, Sharkey week
Susie pronounced "I'm totally going to be your slut in the bedroom, (but) I'm still going to be a lady". Tiara week had just become forbidden fruit and Stuart spent his time parading around in sweatpants with a blatant disregard for underwear.
by Sharkey & Bubbles July 12, 2022
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Ginger Meadows

Ginger Meadows was a Jewish B-movie actress of the 1950s and the original Ginger Bombshell. Known initially for her curvaceous beauty, the “Boobs from Bangor" was an actress of limited range that had “casting couch" affairs to land prominent roles. She is best known for her battles with cake addiction.

At age 18, Meadows won the title Miss Tayto Crisps. Early in her career, advertisers considered her too promiscuous, which led to her losing her first assignment as a foot model for Vicks VapoRub.

In 1954, she auditioned at Paramount. Ginger failed to impress and began to use cleavage to gain notoriety. In doing so she landed arguably her biggest role with the Landshark film franchise.

Throughout her time, Meadows had an on-off love affair with the non-Dairy magnate Haferflocken Milch. Little is known of Milch prior to 1946, only that his obsession forced him to fund her acting career with Nazi gold. The couple pursued their affair on squash courts that led to her sponsorship by Wilko’s rackets.

In March of 1956, Meadows sustained a career ending bedroom eye injury that forced her to cease acting. Conversely, her adult film career flourished as she became brand ambassador for the Percy Penis Vibrator Co., promoting weight loss benefits of their products.

In later life she was depicted as a spinster, obsessed with her Ring doorbell and many cats. Posthumously, Meadows received an honorary doctorate from the University of Liberia for services to laser eye surgery.
Susie gave Stuart sixty minutes to do whatever he wanted with her. Without a thought Stuart requested an hour with her raunchy alter ego, Ginger Meadows. She reached for her pink leotard and safety glasses.
by Sharkey & Bubbles March 27, 2023
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Haferflocken Milch

Haferflocken Milch was a German politician, military leader and war criminal. He was one of the most powerful figures in the National Socialist German Workers' Party, which ruled Germany from 1933 to 1945

Following the end of the war, Herr Milch escaped to Argentina where he created a non-dairy, gluten-free, nut-free, vegan alternative to cow's milk that was to later find popularity in cafes across Berlin.
Susie's laugh was heard throughout the building as Stuart ordered the Haferflocken Milch and Goering burger.
by Sharkey & Bubbles March 17, 2023
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NIT-C

The Northern Ireland Tattoo Community was formed in the 1990s and consisted of a group of young students who constantly plagued the influential tattooist ‘Sailor Bill’ with requests for single words in fonts that were not synonymous with his style.

The artist, based around the Coleraine area, was thought to have become disillusioned…. but not anywhere near as disillusioned as those who later went on to think cravats and patchwork dresses were cool.
Susie pondered over what word to have tattooed on her foo faaaaaa….. ‘Live’, ‘Laugh’, or maybe ‘Love’…..? The girls back at NIT-C would be dead impressed, unlike Sailor Bill. He conceded to do the the tattoo, but only after it was agreed it would be in his own indecipherable font.
by Sharkey & Bubbles August 30, 2022
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Two squirrels in a walnut tree

A literal statement about two squirrels playfully climbing a walnut tree on a sunny Spring morning
Stuart was feeling "chirpy" as he watched two squirrels in a walnut tree from his bed. Because Susie's mind was typically in the gutter, she assumed this to be a euphemism for the contents of Stuart's underwear. If only she had double carpeted her bottom step!
by Sharkey & Bubbles May 7, 2022
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