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Raul (comes out at night)'s definitions

churning the jackson

When the world's oil reserves run out in 2050, the oil companies will be forced to drill down into Michael Jackson's grave to extract the vast amounts of crude that have collected off of his broken down plastic face.
Suddenly a loud persistent noise could be heard in the Hollywood Hills around Forest Lawn Cemetery. It wasn't road construction, but the sound of the oil rig churning the jackson.
by Raul (comes out at night) December 17, 2013
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Asshole Lane

The lane on a highway directly adjacent to an off ramp lane where Assholes try to cut in at the very last possible second to avoid a line up. This generates new traffic in the asshole lane and a subsequent chain reaction into neighboring lanes.

It is a major root of rush hour traffic on highways worldwide.
Passenger: "Dude get out of this lane quick"
Driver: "Why?"
Passenger: "Because it's the asshole lane!"
Driver: "Thanks you are so wise"
by Raul (comes out at night) December 17, 2009
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JLP

The basic white girl's acronym for tea earl grey hot, the favourite beverage of captain Jean-Luc Picard.
Basic White Girl 1: OMG! PSL?
Basic White Girl 2: Like, we just had one like, an hour ago.

Basic White Girl 1: So like, how about a JLP?

Basic White Girl 2: OMG, like, totally yum!
by Raul (comes out at night) October 19, 2014
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tourettestrial radio

a far more accurate description of terrestrial radio stations that truly believe they are remaining relevant by playing the same old songs over and over and over again.
Tourettestrial radio stations have repeated their short list of songs for so many decades that it's almost like an uncontrollable tic disorder. Most people now have a difficult time tolerating it but accept that their contribution to society is to the best of their abilities.
by Raul (comes out at night) November 22, 2016
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Stempniak

Someone who misses the net by 15 feet on a breakaway/penalty shot/shoot-out.

Can also refer to missing a target by a very wide margin.

Named after the originator of this move, Lee Stempniak, on a shoot-out miss to lose the game for the Toronto Maple Leafs on February 19, 2009 vs. Columbus BlueJackets.
"He shoots, he Stempniaks"

"What a loser, he just Stempniak'd that shot! "

"Way to go, Stempniak".
by Raul (comes out at night) February 20, 2009
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Jizz Snorkel

When you haven't seen your woman in so long that you bust such a major cum flood all over her that she needs a breathing apparatus.
Also, you should make sure she has a lifejacket as she will probably be swimming in a few months worth of jizz when you bust a nut... At least give the girl a jizz snorkel.
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horn junkie

An idiot who completely blocks traffic through an intersection by trying to go forward or make a left turn when there is clearly nowhere to go, then receives a violent orchestra of horns that rivals Beethoven's 9th symphony.

The horn junkie is a major cause of rush hour gridlock.
"Come on lady! *HONK* *HONK* *HONK*"

"That horn junkie is just asking for it"

"Mommy I'm scared why are all the people honking at us?"
by Raul (comes out at night) December 17, 2009
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