Professor Simon J. Futtbucker's definitions
When you are eating pistachios and invariably one goes in your mouth that tastes like a bucket of shit. Aka, a 'bad' one.
"Ughh! Aghhh!" Cries Mickey, spitting out green fragments.
"Garsh," Said Goofy. "What happened Mick?"
"Eeeeew. I was eating pistachios and suddenly one of them tasted... well, like shit!" said Mickey frowning.
"More like 'Shitstachios'!" Laughed Goofy.
"Garsh," Said Goofy. "What happened Mick?"
"Eeeeew. I was eating pistachios and suddenly one of them tasted... well, like shit!" said Mickey frowning.
"More like 'Shitstachios'!" Laughed Goofy.
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker July 7, 2025
Get the Shitstachiomug. When you walk past a dispenser of alcohol sanitizing agent, you squirt a nice amount into your hand and then slap it across your mark's face, yelling, "Dirtless-Sanchez!"
They can't be too pissed off, after all, you just cleaned their lips for them.
They can't be too pissed off, after all, you just cleaned their lips for them.
Goofy, spitting nails: "That fuck'in Mickey-- he done got me agin!"
Donald: "What did that goddamn rat do this time?"
Goofy: Well, when I was just walking into the Disney store, Mickey filled his hand with sanitizing gel and slapped it across my face! Then he yelled, 'Dirtless-Sanchez!'"
Donald: "I know! It burned my fucking beak for a full day!"
Donald: "What did that goddamn rat do this time?"
Goofy: Well, when I was just walking into the Disney store, Mickey filled his hand with sanitizing gel and slapped it across my face! Then he yelled, 'Dirtless-Sanchez!'"
Donald: "I know! It burned my fucking beak for a full day!"
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker March 13, 2021
Get the dirtless-sanchezmug. Where you apply makeup on your face and then jack off while raining down tears in front of a full-length mirror.
Goofy: "Gosh Mick-- I heard that Minnie packed up her things and left you?"
Mickey: "Huh Huh! Actually, she came back, apologized and afterwards we had great makeup sex!"
Goofy: "...Is that lipstick on your mouth?"
Mickey, wiping it off nervously: "Huh huh! It must be hers!"
Mickey: "Huh Huh! Actually, she came back, apologized and afterwards we had great makeup sex!"
Goofy: "...Is that lipstick on your mouth?"
Mickey, wiping it off nervously: "Huh huh! It must be hers!"
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker May 30, 2024
Get the Makeup Sexmug. A Navy buddy of mine, Don Armstrong (RIP buddy) had terrible hemorrhoids-- they would bleed and make perfect doll-sized kiss marks inside his underwear.
Don's Wife: "Don! You sick fuck! Did you pay a midget to wear lipstick and kiss your goddamn underwear?"
Don: "No honey... those are from my hemorrhoids."
Don's Wife: "... you mean this is actually... blood?"
Don: "It's best to think of them as Underwear Kisses."
Don: "No honey... those are from my hemorrhoids."
Don's Wife: "... you mean this is actually... blood?"
Don: "It's best to think of them as Underwear Kisses."
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker August 3, 2018
Get the Underwear Kissesmug. When you let out a long, silent fart in a crowded elevator. You wait until the elevator door closes and then say, "Hey, does anyone smell popcorn?" You smile as you hear everyone in the elevator inhale through their nostrils in unison.
Goofy: "Hey, Mick-- Garsh, what's so funny?"
Mickey: "Huh, huh! I was riding in an elevator full of people and served up some hot, Elevator Popcorn!"
Mickey: "Huh, huh! I was riding in an elevator full of people and served up some hot, Elevator Popcorn!"
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker November 19, 2018
Get the elevator popcornmug. When your significant other is squeezing a massive pimple and gets their face spackled with shooting sticky sebum.
Mickey: "Remember that huge zit on my back?"
Goofy: "Yeah, the size of a bird's egg. Why?"
Mickey: "I had Minnie bust it last night and it shot all over her face and up her nose."
Goofy: "Garsh! Like one of those Jap'nese movies-- Bukkake!"
Mickey: "More like Bukkacne!"
Goofy: "Yeah, the size of a bird's egg. Why?"
Mickey: "I had Minnie bust it last night and it shot all over her face and up her nose."
Goofy: "Garsh! Like one of those Jap'nese movies-- Bukkake!"
Mickey: "More like Bukkacne!"
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker August 2, 2011
Get the Bukkacnemug. A coastal resort in Spain near Malaga. Once called an 'adult's Disneyland' in the 1980's when it had a female to male ratio of 7 to 1. There were a few transvestites then.
In the 1990's Eastern-European neo-nazis moved in and the town fell into disrepair. The transvestites somehow mated successfully. Moroccans started arriving and crime went sky-high!
Today, it's FILLED with so much gay action that your asshole looks like a windsock by the time you return home. Filthy moroccans everywhere!
In the 1990's Eastern-European neo-nazis moved in and the town fell into disrepair. The transvestites somehow mated successfully. Moroccans started arriving and crime went sky-high!
Today, it's FILLED with so much gay action that your asshole looks like a windsock by the time you return home. Filthy moroccans everywhere!
"We're in T-town (Torremolinos)! I don't see any hot chicks yet... lets ask these two gentlemen walking poodles where they could be?"
Monty Python: "Torremolinos! Torremolinos!" Actually, The ones that infected Graham Chapman are probably dead now too.
Monty Python: "Torremolinos! Torremolinos!" Actually, The ones that infected Graham Chapman are probably dead now too.
by Professor Simon J. Futtbucker May 25, 2011
Get the Torremolinosmug.