Pantaloon's definitions

sleestak

A last final emptying of the penile shaft, often resembling grain tumbling off the conveyor, resembles also the introduction to the TV series Land of the Lost, when the humans are tossed over a waterfall with some bad editing.

I was able to prop myself up to get a good sleestak, covering her landing strip with my UFOs.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

Alice's Lunch

The act of shitting in a lunch box instead of making a healthy meal. Frequent occurrence on the Popular American Television show, "The Brady Bunch."

Peter Brady opened up his Scooby Doo Lunch box to the undeniable pungency of Alice's Lunch. He tossed the fetid pile at Buddy Hinton, who was just glad it wasn't a bowl of her famous hershey squirts. Alice was always had a couple of zingers ready, that was for sure.

by Pantaloon January 28, 2008

milch talk

Speaking in iambic pentameter with a steady stream of obscenity, ala HBO's "Deadwood."

Voice from the box-"Welcome to Macdonald's, can I take your order?"

Driver-"Would a motherfucker be so fuckin' blind
as undiscerning to discern
the motherfuckin' value of fuckin value meal partook?"

Voice- "That'll be $6.49, please drive around to the second window, and thank you for choosing Motherfuckin' Macdonald's, Milch talker."

by Pantaloon January 18, 2008

gwen stephani

What happens sometimes when the alcohol wears off before you get a girl back to your room. With the lights turned on, and the buzz gone, you realize that anything that might have caught your eye is really just derivative and uninteresting without the special effects and booze, and that really what you've got looks more like a skinny little boy than Madonna, Greta Garbo,Maryln Monroe, or a mildly amusing Blow-up doll.
The actual gwen stephani is the snapping noise as your dick and scrotum shrivels up rapidly into your abdomen. May require hospitalization and/or counseling for recovery.

Jimmy thought he was being a smart driver by only having one drink, but when his "date" came out of the bathroom, he almost thought he saw balls, but couldn't clear his head enough to prevent a full-on gwen stephanie from knocking him to the ground.

by Pantaloon January 18, 2008

Wal-Mart

Verb found in alien cookbook to serve man- cause of rising stock prices, sedation and weight gain of local population in US and China, and utter destruction of all critical thinking.

1)Wal-Mart for twenty years or until meat is about to fall off the bone.
2)We were going to repair the washing machine but figured why not Wal-Mart it.

by Pantaloon January 12, 2008

Olympervert

Someone who needs to watch figure skaters and Girls gymnastics to splume.

The Olympervert tried to time his finish for the exact moment of her dismount, but he misjudged and fired off at the springboard. The Russian judge gave him a 9.4

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

handy

1)European word for cell phone.
2)Also known as coochie war cry, the slapping of the hand furiously against the vagina to arouse the warriors.
3)hand job.
4)A short skirt with little or no undergarmentry, to allow ready access.

1)We were able to get three bars on the Handy when we took the u-bahn Unter dem Linden.
2)Vera asked me for a Handie before she went in to ask for a raise. She leaned her backend across the aisle and I was able to slap her waggle silly from the comfort of my own cubicle.
3)Before the big sales presentation, I asked Wendy for a handy, just to steady my nerves, but she would only give me a bronski and a hummer.
4)Sarah wore a handy into the office, and was ready for dictation with minimal fabric displacement.

by Pantaloon January 17, 2008