65 definitions by Pantaloon

1)The difference maker between the vagina and the anus, or the Ball sack and another anus
2)A jumping-off point, a place of decision
3)Sweaty region that is curiously intriguing to its owner
1)He has learned that starting from the front was crucial, as one time he had boldly worked his way from the asshole forward, only to encounter a man-sized taint.
2)The presidential candidate announced that he had moved beyond his own taint, and was ready to make the sacrifice for the good of the country. He was entering the fray, and would help to heal the taints of the American people.
3)He could not help but do a quick taint test during his filibuster, and for that Senator Strom's reputation was forever tainted.
by Pantaloon January 7, 2008
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A form of torture created by Pontius Pilate, the man who crucified the savior. It's not as easy as you might think. St. Paul was certified in Pilates and Advanced Spin. The original 12 wanted to emphasize diet (bread, wine, omega 3s from fish oil, etc.) This caused quite a schism as you might imagine. This went on for awhile, until the Serfing craze caught on with the Barbarian invasion of Ringo, George, Cedric, and Dagobert.
After the crucifixion,a lot of fitness buffs tried to jump on the band wagon so Pilate was forced opened a gym (Pilates Fitness, inc.) at the local coliseum and hire some trainers. The gold members were given the "Martyr" card.
by Pantaloon January 17, 2008
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1)to be shoeless and snaggle-toothed with straggly red hair and gropey unwashed hands.
2)An under-emphasized flavor in fine wine.
3)The warbling of arm fat on the interstate.
1)She offered to play tonsil-hockey with me, but I was thinking she was a mite too titchie fer me. Her titchie hands were fast on the Johnson like crows on roadkill.
2)I'm not saying the Cabernet did not finish exquisitely. I'm just suggesting that the dingleberry was a bit titchie.
3)I was very upset to be coming home for the holidays, but was calmed by the sweet serenade of Aunt Edna's titchie.
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
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Small silver block that characters on detective television shows,all the CSIs, and "House" pull out of their pockets when the writers can't get off the bong long enough to come up with a better plot device. This cube magically give the characters the next surprising clue which allows the story to dangle or move to its surprise ending, depending on how close to the end of the hour it is. See DNA EVIDENCE
Plot direction:
Caruso:I'll see you in hell/jail/syndication.
(reach into pocket for cell phone) Caruso (pause, adjust glasses, or draw back sport coat to get good handle on waist). I'm coming in.
Peripheral Snarky CSI Staffer: Who was that?
Caruso: They found-the murder weapon/killer/a time slot for CSI Des Moines.
by Pantaloon January 3, 2008
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The ruse of having a guy come over to fix something, with the real intention of having sex with him. Much the same way Marianne, Ginger, Mrs. Howell, and the Skipper, used to play the Professor on the ol' TV classic Gilligan's Island.
Elaine worked the professor on Newman. She had him come over to fix her mail slot, and he delivered all over her.
by Pantaloon January 28, 2008
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Common signal used among married couples. It allows the pair to go on, business as usual, and still have sex without bothering the husband with all that foreplay nonsense. The woman goes into the bedroom and works herself into a lather using whatever means necessary (nothing for the man to concern himself with). The man hits the record button on the remote, gives her the whammy jammy, and then takes a nap. The woman is free to go about her chores, or chat on the phone.
Betty needed the Wizmatic Double-Dong to do the trick, but she managed to work up a reasonable wide on. She put both hands to her mouth and called, "Fire in the hole!" She set herself to an appropriate position as she heard Mario lurching off the couch and scratching himself. She lay with her cheek sideways on the pillow and felt the cooling draft on her taint when Mario swung open the door. And then he was upon her, writhing like a captured weasel, spending himself like casino chips and collapsing over her back. Without missing a beat, Betty swung around the wizmatic and locked onto her target, guiding the rocket to ground zero. She grabbed a pear of sweats, went to the fridge, and grabbed a pint of Haagen-Daaz. Betty dropped herself onto the couch, and turned on Lifetime, while the snores of Mario rumbled steadily from the bedroom.
by Pantaloon January 9, 2008
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Political and Moral sign posts for the walking dead.
1) I tried to reason with my mother but it seemed her entire vocabulary had been reduced to a few trite talking points she had heard from the Bills (O'Reilly and Crystal). I had learned to aim for the head when shooting zombies, and now was no time for mistakes.
2) The make-up man did a remarkable job of hiding the bite wounds on the president, but that odd speech rhytm and blathering talking points were a dead give-away. The camera hid the mangled hand, but you could see the rotting flesh on the live feed.
by Pantaloon January 11, 2008
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