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Pantaloon's definitions

wide on

The female equivalent to a male hard on. The woman's vagina swells up until it resembles a tazered, twitching piece of liver, and the man can enjoy a snug, responsive ride, much like a European Sports car that looks like the organ of a cow.
In due time, she had achieved a wide on. Fortunately Bert was finished before his ass cheeks collapsed.
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
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muddy bootprint

Aka muddy boot- the darkened skin that radiates outward from the vagina at the center of a woman's inner thighs until the typical skin of the body is attained.
He had only gone down on girls with lily-white skin before Esmerelda, and was jarred by unexpected sight of a muddy bootprint. He descended into the dark abyss with trepidation.
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
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Olympervert

Someone who needs to watch figure skaters and Girls gymnastics to splume.
The Olympervert tried to time his finish for the exact moment of her dismount, but he misjudged and fired off at the springboard. The Russian judge gave him a 9.4
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
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gwen stephani

What happens sometimes when the alcohol wears off before you get a girl back to your room. With the lights turned on, and the buzz gone, you realize that anything that might have caught your eye is really just derivative and uninteresting without the special effects and booze, and that really what you've got looks more like a skinny little boy than Madonna, Greta Garbo,Maryln Monroe, or a mildly amusing Blow-up doll.
The actual gwen stephani is the snapping noise as your dick and scrotum shrivels up rapidly into your abdomen. May require hospitalization and/or counseling for recovery.
Jimmy thought he was being a smart driver by only having one drink, but when his "date" came out of the bathroom, he almost thought he saw balls, but couldn't clear his head enough to prevent a full-on gwen stephanie from knocking him to the ground.
by Pantaloon January 18, 2008
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Wal-Mart

Verb found in alien cookbook to serve man- cause of rising stock prices, sedation and weight gain of local population in US and China, and utter destruction of all critical thinking.
1)Wal-Mart for twenty years or until meat is about to fall off the bone.
2)We were going to repair the washing machine but figured why not Wal-Mart it.
by Pantaloon January 12, 2008
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the professor

The ruse of having a guy come over to fix something, with the real intention of having sex with him. Much the same way Marianne, Ginger, Mrs. Howell, and the Skipper, used to play the Professor on the ol' TV classic Gilligan's Island.
Elaine worked the professor on Newman. She had him come over to fix her mail slot, and he delivered all over her.
by Pantaloon January 28, 2008
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Milk the bull

1)The act of trying to produce milk from a steer. Results may vary.
2)Euphemism for yanking the genitals in a downward motion.
1)Josiah did his very best to draw dairy product from the old Fella, but he was kicked clear in the head. Just goes to show, you can teach a man to fish, but ye jus kain milk the bull.
2)Jillian attempted to milk Tommy's bull right there at the booth, but she only succeeded in drawing the attention of the other patrons at Applebee's. The steady popping noise was too distracting from the delightful delicacies of which they were partaking. The waitress was forced to lend a hand to expedite the process.
by Pantaloon January 26, 2008
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