PDXJohnny99's definitions

aggrovention

An intervention by family and friends with the intent of reaching out emotionally to a troubled individual, but it goes terribly wrong and ends up in possible arguments, anger, vulgarities, screaming, fist-fights, and visits to the nearest emergency room.

Uncle Bobby's intervention didn't go well this morning. We started with a prayer and it turned out he was on PCP and punched Aunt Angie in the face and kicked his buddy Mike in the groin. Then he grabbed their dog Ladie and dropkicked it across the living room. It turned out to be a fucking aggrovention.

by PDXJohnny99 April 14, 2013

Rainiac

Someone who absoulutely loves rainy or cloudy weather.

Johnny lives in Portland because he loves loves loves the rain. It cheers him up. He is a rainiac.

Extreme rainiacs sit in the shower with an umbrella when rainy season is over.

by PDXJohnny99 June 1, 2013

pill roulette

When a doctor tests certain medications on a patient, but actually worsens the problem through trial and error.

Micky: my doc put me on antidepressants... but it actually made me suicidal... so he put me on another kind and now don't give shit about anything... so now he thinks I need a different kind... I feel like a lab rat!

Mallory: Sounds like pill roulette to me.

by PDXJohnny99 April 10, 2013

Don't knock it 'til you rock it

Basically, give something or someone a chance before you put it down.

1. Carl: I'm never watching Game of Thrones... I don't like fantasy.

Carol: Game of Thrones is the best show ever. Ever.

Carl: Shoot. I knocked it... before I rocked it.

2. Stan: I hate to think I'd ever eat sautéed pig stomach... it sounds gross.

Deborah: It's actually okay. My aunt makes it on Thanksgiving.

Stan: Fuck. Seriously???

Deborah: Don't knock it 'til you rock it.

3. Vern: WOW crack IS powerful.

Bert: Goddamn right it's powerful. Don't ever knock it til you rock it. Fucker.

by pdxjohnny99 January 3, 2016

Murder you to Death

A threat that's explains itself.

Big Brother: I'm gonna eat your cookies, sis. That okay?
Sister: You do and...I'll fucking eat your fucking eyeballs, fucker!
Big Brother: crunch crunch
Sister: If you fucking eat one fucking more I'll castrate your fucking dog with my teeth!
Big Brother: crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch
Sister: I'll fucking MURDER YOU TO DEATH!! FUCKER!!
Big Brother: crunch. crunch crunch crunch crunch. crunch crunch

by PDXJohnny99 April 16, 2013

Board Walker

Nickname for fans of the incredible HBO series Boardwalk Empire

Johnny: Boardwalk Empire is the most unpredicatable and most boldly written drama of the century! I am a Board WALKER!!
Dee: Well... our century is rather new...
Johnny: ....and the realism and the truth and the era and the acting... and the CHARACTERS! OMG!
Dee: uh...
Johnny: ...and the authenticity, the unflinching violence....
Dee: zzzzzzzzzzz

by PDXJohnny99 April 13, 2013

As American as Hot Dogs and Hip Hop

Derived from the phrase "As American as hot dogs and apple pie". Both hotdogs and Hip Hop were originated in America, Hip Hop started in the South Bronx.

Once there was a street artist who got busted by a cop. The intricate graffiti was displaying George W. Bush as a mass murderer, with a chainsaw, attacking cripples and little nerd children. And then the cop went ape shit. Or... pig shit.
Cop: This is filthy! Like a wall of... turds! Filthy! You're bashing The Dubbya.
Graf Writer: Its symbolic. It shows Bush killing all the innocents... with this war that cousin-fucking hillbilly started.
Cop: You little... spraypaintin'... turd! You are Un-American!! Bashin' the Dubbya!
Graf Writer: I'm as American as hot dogs and Hip Hop.

by PDXJohnny99 May 1, 2013