PDXJohnny99's definitions

Sesame Standoff

Whenever someone eats any kind of sandwhich of burger on a sesame seed bun, and once finished proceeds to pick and eat the leftover sesame seeds off the plate or wrapper.

Dawn: Okay... are you done with you're roast beef sandwhiches? Let's go.
Smitty: No way. Sesame standoff.
Dawn: For real? You embarass the shit out of me when you do this!
Smitty then starts picking every sesame seed off the wrappers.
Dawn: I'm never eating out with you again, dad.

by PDXJohnny99 April 16, 2013

As American as Hot Dogs and Hip Hop

Derived from the phrase "As American as hot dogs and apple pie". Both hotdogs and Hip Hop were originated in America, Hip Hop started in the South Bronx.

Once there was a street artist who got busted by a cop. The intricate graffiti was displaying George W. Bush as a mass murderer, with a chainsaw, attacking cripples and little nerd children. And then the cop went ape shit. Or... pig shit.
Cop: This is filthy! Like a wall of... turds! Filthy! You're bashing The Dubbya.
Graf Writer: Its symbolic. It shows Bush killing all the innocents... with this war that cousin-fucking hillbilly started.
Cop: You little... spraypaintin'... turd! You are Un-American!! Bashin' the Dubbya!
Graf Writer: I'm as American as hot dogs and Hip Hop.

by PDXJohnny99 May 1, 2013

Board Walker

Nickname for fans of the incredible HBO series Boardwalk Empire

Johnny: Boardwalk Empire is the most unpredicatable and most boldly written drama of the century! I am a Board WALKER!!
Dee: Well... our century is rather new...
Johnny: ....and the realism and the truth and the era and the acting... and the CHARACTERS! OMG!
Dee: uh...
Johnny: ...and the authenticity, the unflinching violence....
Dee: zzzzzzzzzzz

by PDXJohnny99 April 13, 2013

pill roulette

When a doctor tests certain medications on a patient, but actually worsens the problem through trial and error.

Micky: my doc put me on antidepressants... but it actually made me suicidal... so he put me on another kind and now don't give shit about anything... so now he thinks I need a different kind... I feel like a lab rat!

Mallory: Sounds like pill roulette to me.

by PDXJohnny99 April 10, 2013

Dirt Dumb

Basically, the dumbest of the dumbest. Dumb as dirt.

Loyd is dirt dumb. He dropped his toilet paper roll in the toilet and put it in the microwave to dry it and burned the entire goddamn trailer park down. Dirt dumb.

by pdxjohnny99 March 27, 2016

Room Zooms

When someone is so shitfaced that the room is spinning.

Jodi: Oh my gawd... I'm soooooo druunk.... whooooo.... room zooms!!
Ralph: Not again. If you vomit on my airbrushed Supertramp couch cover again I'm really-
Jodi: RRRRAAAWWWLLLLLFFFFF!!

by PDXJohnny99 April 12, 2013

puppy parkour

Parkour: holistic training for humans.
Puppy: a young doggie, a spaz.

When you get an untrained puppy and the motherfucker goes completely batshit insane every waking moment.

Jaylene: oh... I'm so glad school is out. Let's watch tv. 
BOOM! 
Jane: what was that?? 
Jaylene: oh... my new puppy. Bouncing off a wall.... or the couch... or... 
Jane: I haven't seen him yet... 
Jaylene: Every minute or so he'll hit a wall and slide down. That's the best time to see him. 
BAAMMM! 
Jaylene: Puppy Parkour... what can I say? 
Jane: What breed is he? 
Jaylene: Part Chihuahua... part Pug.... part retard. He's a designer breed.

by PDXJohnny99 April 28, 2013