PDXJohnny99's definitions

Decency Flush

If a Courtesy Flush is flushing while still on the toilet (to eliminate odor for others' sakes), then a Decency Flush is simply flushing the toilet when done pooping... period.

Dear roommate: A 'courtesy flush' isn't required but a 'decency flush' kinda is. So please remember to flush after you shit your next hobbit. Okay, thanks.

Dear roommate: Found another shit show in the toilet today. Please refer to my last note... the whole 'decency flush' thing. Okay. Yeah. Thanks.

Dear roommate: Another hobbit found.

Dear roommate: Okay. Scratch the decency flush thing... moving on to 'mandated flush'. Please comply.

Dear roommate: I'm moving out. Not comfortable wearing this hazmat suit anymore.

by PDXJohnny99 June 25, 2013

Chalkies

Artists that draw on sidewalks or other surfaces with chalk; either by children or credible street artists. Chalk art by children are random drawings for fun, but Chalk art by actual artists can be extremely detailed and there are various styles, competitions and 'battles' with chalk sidewalk artists, making it a respected medium; prominently in Tacoma Washington where battles (also known as chalk-offs) have become a weekly event in Frost Park for the last few years.

" Jeez, these Chalkies are getting annoying. Damn kids better clean this up."

"Wow, Spim is an amazing Chalkie! He won the chalk-off again three weeks in a row. Look at the fucking detail in his work... amazing."

by PDXJohnny99 August 26, 2013

Spunk Junkie

A person that digs sperm.

She's a Spunk Junkie.

She's got the need for seed.

She loves the Jerk Juice. The Cock Cream. The Tang. The Meat Mix. The Man Milk. The Boy Batter. The Load Launch. The Nut Butter. The Jizz Juice. The Salt Shake. The White Wash.

by PDXJohnny99 August 26, 2013

Jobmare

Those nightmares people tend to have related to their occupations. Often it tends to be a reoccurring nightmare and a supervisor is a prominant figure in the dream usually.

Wally recently started a new job as a master control operator at the local television station. He is the person responsible for making sure the television shows air perfectly. He is completely stressed out due to the fact that the job is hyper-technical and his work is being watched by thousands of viewers at any given time.
Now he's having jobmares. In these dreams he is constantly off-air and his boss either stands quietly behind him or screams in his face... and his entire shift becomes one major shitstorm and Wally's name becomes the source of constant putdowns around work. Then he wakes up.
He airs Headline News every shift at his job. The jobmares are ruining his sleep almost nightly. Last night he fell asleep at home with the tv on, then headline news came on and Wally snapped awake... thinking he missed his commercial break and ended up shitting the bed.

by PDXJohnny99 April 16, 2013

As American as Hot Dogs and Hip Hop

Derived from the phrase "As American as hot dogs and apple pie". Both hotdogs and Hip Hop were originated in America, Hip Hop started in the South Bronx.

Once there was a street artist who got busted by a cop. The intricate graffiti was displaying George W. Bush as a mass murderer, with a chainsaw, attacking cripples and little nerd children. And then the cop went ape shit. Or... pig shit.
Cop: This is filthy! Like a wall of... turds! Filthy! You're bashing The Dubbya.
Graf Writer: Its symbolic. It shows Bush killing all the innocents... with this war that cousin-fucking hillbilly started.
Cop: You little... spraypaintin'... turd! You are Un-American!! Bashin' the Dubbya!
Graf Writer: I'm as American as hot dogs and Hip Hop.

by PDXJohnny99 May 1, 2013

Board Walker

Nickname for fans of the incredible HBO series Boardwalk Empire

Johnny: Boardwalk Empire is the most unpredicatable and most boldly written drama of the century! I am a Board WALKER!!
Dee: Well... our century is rather new...
Johnny: ....and the realism and the truth and the era and the acting... and the CHARACTERS! OMG!
Dee: uh...
Johnny: ...and the authenticity, the unflinching violence....
Dee: zzzzzzzzzzz

by PDXJohnny99 April 13, 2013

Sesame Standoff

Whenever someone eats any kind of sandwhich of burger on a sesame seed bun, and once finished proceeds to pick and eat the leftover sesame seeds off the plate or wrapper.

Dawn: Okay... are you done with you're roast beef sandwhiches? Let's go.
Smitty: No way. Sesame standoff.
Dawn: For real? You embarass the shit out of me when you do this!
Smitty then starts picking every sesame seed off the wrappers.
Dawn: I'm never eating out with you again, dad.

by PDXJohnny99 April 16, 2013