PDXJohnny99's definitions

Indie Day

Short for Indepedence Day, the Fourth of July.

"Happy Indie Day! Don't blow any fingers off with those firecrackers!"

"Happy Indie Day! Is there any beer left?"

"Happy Indie Day! Look, I'm wearing red white and... shit these pants are brown!"

"Happy Indie day. No, not indie rock. No, not Indiana Jones either. No, not indie films... fuck it... Happy 4th of July!"

by PDXJohnny99 August 18, 2013

Every Time I Breathe Air

A remark used about something that is ongoing, redundant, never changing, redundant and redundant.

Melanie: I hate this job. I hate everyone I work with. They're all backstabbin' cocksuckers. I hate my salary. I can't afford to feed my fish. It's your fault, you dick!
Melanie's boss: You tell me that every time I breathe air.

Zoe: Gosh, I'm sick of this new server here at work.
Waggs: It crashes every time I breathe air. No worries.

Melanie: I hate being sober. I hate getting high all day. I hate you, dick. You raped my dreams and let them die, you fucker. I could have been a dancer, cocksucker.
Melanie's son: Yeah, I know, mom. You tell me every time I breathe air.

Waggs: Dang, how many times are they going to show Empire Strikes Back?
Zoe: Its Spike TV. They show it every time I breathe air. Heck, let's watch it again. No worries.

Melanie: Fuuuuuuuuuck. I hate my spending problem. I hate that I have no money to spend. I hate all this stupid shit I bought. I hate this clutter. I hate being called a fucking horder all the time. I fucking hate you, bitch. Why didn't you get me that abortion?
Melanie's mom: Trust me I would have gotten my abortion if I had the money.
Melanie: Wait... what?? YOUR abortion.
Melanie's mom: Oh dear. Did I say that out loud?

by PDXJohnny99 May 22, 2013

Murder you to Death

A threat that's explains itself.

Big Brother: I'm gonna eat your cookies, sis. That okay?
Sister: You do and...I'll fucking eat your fucking eyeballs, fucker!
Big Brother: crunch crunch
Sister: If you fucking eat one fucking more I'll castrate your fucking dog with my teeth!
Big Brother: crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch
Sister: I'll fucking MURDER YOU TO DEATH!! FUCKER!!
Big Brother: crunch. crunch crunch crunch crunch. crunch crunch

by PDXJohnny99 April 16, 2013

zombite

Any fan of zombie films, shows, books, games, etc. Usually in association with the post-Night of the Living Dead era, aka George Romero zombies, aka RomZoms; and not classic voodoo zombies.

Danny is a true zombite. He has every issue of the Walking Dead. He has every Romero film on vhs, laser disc, bluray and dvd.

But his Uncle Harold was the biggest zombite he ever met. Uncle Harold invented a sexual position called "zombie-style". He's divorced now.
Every Thanksgiving he would stuff the turkey with pig guts and fake blood and he and the children would tear the turkey apart with their barehands. He has lost custody of the children.
He used to fake-bite coworkers on the neck in bathrooms or elevators. He's now unemployed.
For two years straight he was first place in the state Zombie Run. Now he's banned because of doping.

by PDXJohnny99 April 17, 2013

Tube Snoozer

Someone who needs or tends to leave the television on to help them sleep. Usually rerunning a movie or tv show they've seen so many times to comfort (or bore) them to sleep.

Dave: Your wife Rhonda watches the same freakin' movie every night. Why?
Brent: It makes her fall asleep...and now it makes me fall asleep cuz its freakin' mind-numbing.
Dave: Dear God... I'm surrounded by tube snoozers.

by PDXJohnny99 April 11, 2013

Spunk Junkie

A person that digs sperm.

She's a Spunk Junkie.

She's got the need for seed.

She loves the Jerk Juice. The Cock Cream. The Tang. The Meat Mix. The Man Milk. The Boy Batter. The Load Launch. The Nut Butter. The Jizz Juice. The Salt Shake. The White Wash.

by PDXJohnny99 August 26, 2013

Chalkies

Artists that draw on sidewalks or other surfaces with chalk; either by children or credible street artists. Chalk art by children are random drawings for fun, but Chalk art by actual artists can be extremely detailed and there are various styles, competitions and 'battles' with chalk sidewalk artists, making it a respected medium; prominently in Tacoma Washington where battles (also known as chalk-offs) have become a weekly event in Frost Park for the last few years.

" Jeez, these Chalkies are getting annoying. Damn kids better clean this up."

"Wow, Spim is an amazing Chalkie! He won the chalk-off again three weeks in a row. Look at the fucking detail in his work... amazing."

by PDXJohnny99 August 26, 2013