OneWhoKnowsBetter's definitions
A. Someone who fails chemistry class.
B. Derogatory name for people who believe in the existence of
chemtrails.
B. Derogatory name for people who believe in the existence of
chemtrails.
A. Dude I failed my chemistry class, I'm such a chemtard!
B. Dude did you just hear what Adam said? He claims the Illuminati are trying to take over the world by injecting poison in the contrails of jet planes. He is such a chemtard.
B. Dude did you just hear what Adam said? He claims the Illuminati are trying to take over the world by injecting poison in the contrails of jet planes. He is such a chemtard.
by OneWhoKnowsBetter July 10, 2012
Get the Chemtardmug. The man or woman who whenever a movie is made about a mental hospital is always portrayed as a hero. In those movies they play the role of the tireless defender of the mentally ill who fights against the system. In real life they are the ones who run the mental hospitals therefore they are the system. Movies are like this because most writers of these scripts have been patients at mental hospitals. Social workers readily accept credit for the good and are even better at putting the blame for bad situations off on the Doctors, nurses, aides, and that ambiguous entity called "The team."
Sally the the social worker ordered Adam the aide to take Mary the mental patient's personal radio away from her because she only earned four stars out of five in Sally's therapy group. Adam takes the radio. Mary the mental patient complains to Sally the social worker about Adam the aide taking her radio. Sally tells Mary she has "No clue" why Adam did that. Mary assaults Adam with a heavy object causing him permanent brain damage. Mary then files abuse and neglect charges against Adam. Sally and Mary both testify against him and he is fired. The local newspaper hears of this and does a story that portrays Sally as a hero and Mary as the heroic victim. The team of social workers who run the institution see to it that Adam gets denied both medical care and unemployment benefits. Adam tries fighting them in court but with brain damage he can't think clearly and neglects his personal appearance. The jury at the trial had all seen a movie the previous night about a mental hospital where the aides were bullies, the patients were victims, and the social workers were heros. Adam does 3 months in jail for his supposed assault against mary and now roams the streets homeless. Sally gets a big promotion. Mary wins a lawsuit against the mental institution and was filthy rich for a short time. A well meaning but incompetent social worker mismanaged her funds.
by OneWhoKnowsBetter December 30, 2011
Get the Social Workermug. If you have ever had a credit card company lose your payment you have probably experienced corporate doublespeak.
A good example; You get a late notice from your credit card company. Instead of paying the minimum you pay the entire account off. Afterward they keep sending late notices and making phone calls. You phone them, you e-mail them, and you even send letters by snail mail to them.
All responses you receive from them are in lawyer language. They admit nothing and say nothing that makes any sense except to say that you are late with your payment and you will be reported to the credit bureau. Then mysteriously two weeks after payment had been sent electronically to them the payment posts and the calls end.
A good example; You get a late notice from your credit card company. Instead of paying the minimum you pay the entire account off. Afterward they keep sending late notices and making phone calls. You phone them, you e-mail them, and you even send letters by snail mail to them.
All responses you receive from them are in lawyer language. They admit nothing and say nothing that makes any sense except to say that you are late with your payment and you will be reported to the credit bureau. Then mysteriously two weeks after payment had been sent electronically to them the payment posts and the calls end.
Wife: Why are we still getting those calls from the credit card company?
Husband: I paid them off a week ago but they say I did not. I have called them and e-mailed them. At first they act like I am lying. Then after they keep me on hold for a long time their tone turns cautious and they start talking in corporate doublespeak.
Husband: I paid them off a week ago but they say I did not. I have called them and e-mailed them. At first they act like I am lying. Then after they keep me on hold for a long time their tone turns cautious and they start talking in corporate doublespeak.
by OneWhoKnowsBetter September 16, 2012
Get the Corporate Doublespeakmug. A breed of dog developed in Germany starting around 1600. The breed took almost 100 years to develop but is being ruined in modern times by people who cross breed them with any type of dog. The breed is also being affected by owners of puppy mills who sell dogs with genetic defects.
Dachshunds are very loyal to their owners and don't take to strangers unless they are socialized.
Dachshunds are very loyal to their owners and don't take to strangers unless they are socialized.
Shady Bob wanted to get in the dog breeding business. He had a male Dachshund and a female Pekinese. He bred the two and sold them as Longhaired Dachshunds to gullible people.
by OneWhoKnowsBetter August 1, 2012
Get the Dachshundmug. Soldier #1; Poor Tom bought it hardly a day after returning from leave in London!"
Soldier 2; " Yes, after the show comes the shit cart."
Soldier 2; " Yes, after the show comes the shit cart."
by OneWhoKnowsBetter January 24, 2020
Get the After the show comes the shit cart.mug. A small outbuilding, usually unheated, has no air conditioning, where employees go to enjoy smoking a cigarette while anti-smoking Nazi's walk by and give them hateful looks.
Many times you will find non smokers there too. They are there because they like the conversation that sometimes goes on at a smoke shack.
Smokers go there for many different reasons. The main one being that they don't want to offend their non smoking friends. They also know that for many people smoking is not healthy. Many of them want to quit,have tried to quit, but then a anti-smoking Nazi will get in their face and tell them they are evil people." This has the reverse effect on a smoker and makes them want a cigarette even more."
Many times you will find non smokers there too. They are there because they like the conversation that sometimes goes on at a smoke shack.
Smokers go there for many different reasons. The main one being that they don't want to offend their non smoking friends. They also know that for many people smoking is not healthy. Many of them want to quit,have tried to quit, but then a anti-smoking Nazi will get in their face and tell them they are evil people." This has the reverse effect on a smoker and makes them want a cigarette even more."
Two anti-smoking nazis are walking by a smoke shack.
Nazi 1; "Look at that Smoke Shack." "Those people are the scum of the earth."
Nazi 2; " Whenever I see somebody smoking a cigarette I wanna smash it in their face, they really piss me off."
People in the smoke shack " Wow, look at the hateful looks those people are giving us."
Old Man in smoke shack: " Y'all wanna hear a funny story?"
Smoke Shack People; " Oh good!" "Another funny story."
Ols man; " I've known both of them for years." " Yall know I have nothing against pot but let me tell you that those two still smoke pot every night when they get home."
Smoke Shack people; " WHAT???" THEY SMOKE???"
OLd Man " Yes I know...it sounds crazy...but it's true." They consider it a herb and believe it's healthful." "They are actually taking in more tar and nicotine in one joint than i will by smoking a pack of cigarettes."
reformed dope dealer; Laughs and says " He's right and that aint all they do." " The old man knows because he used to smoke pot himself but gave it up years ago."
Old man: " I wish you would not tell that shit on me." "Yes it's true." " I smoked pt socially but gave it up when I got married." "it was damn lonely to be a single man on a Saturday night back then."
Nazi 1; "Look at that Smoke Shack." "Those people are the scum of the earth."
Nazi 2; " Whenever I see somebody smoking a cigarette I wanna smash it in their face, they really piss me off."
People in the smoke shack " Wow, look at the hateful looks those people are giving us."
Old Man in smoke shack: " Y'all wanna hear a funny story?"
Smoke Shack People; " Oh good!" "Another funny story."
Ols man; " I've known both of them for years." " Yall know I have nothing against pot but let me tell you that those two still smoke pot every night when they get home."
Smoke Shack people; " WHAT???" THEY SMOKE???"
OLd Man " Yes I know...it sounds crazy...but it's true." They consider it a herb and believe it's healthful." "They are actually taking in more tar and nicotine in one joint than i will by smoking a pack of cigarettes."
reformed dope dealer; Laughs and says " He's right and that aint all they do." " The old man knows because he used to smoke pot himself but gave it up years ago."
Old man: " I wish you would not tell that shit on me." "Yes it's true." " I smoked pt socially but gave it up when I got married." "it was damn lonely to be a single man on a Saturday night back then."
by OneWhoKnowsBetter December 25, 2012
Get the Smoke Shackmug. An old dude who grew up out in hillbilly land but moved to an urban area when they were a young man. They are an odd mixture of both liberal and conservative. They no longer fit in at their former home but they also don't fit in too well in the city even though they have many friends there.
Urbanized Hillbillies tend to read a lot and like to fix things like cars or anything else that needs fixing. A U.H. is the guy you call on when you need something fixed and you don't have the money to call a repairman, go to a garage, or etc.
Urbanized Hillbillies tend to read a lot and like to fix things like cars or anything else that needs fixing. A U.H. is the guy you call on when you need something fixed and you don't have the money to call a repairman, go to a garage, or etc.
City Boy 1; "Dude these snow chains I put on my tires ain't doing shit in this snow."" I'm gonna take em back then I'm gonna sue the store that sold them, and the company that made them."
City Boy 2: "Let's stop by Bob's house." " Bob's OK but his dad is a urbanized hillbilly."
City Boy 1; " No,he's a dumb motherfucker,"
City Boy 2; " "Yes he's a dumb fuck but there IS a few things those retarded hillbilly's do know." "Heres his house pull in."
Urbanized Hillbilly; "Looks at the car and shakes his head sadly and says; " First off I really would not be driving a classic car in this weather." Secondly; This is a 1969 Mustang and you put the chains on the front tires." " This is a rear wheel drive car, the chains go on the back tires." " Next time y'all do any work on a car go get a Haynes or a Chilton book and read it before you do anything else."
He then gets out his tools and proceeds to to change the chains for them.
Both city boys start jabbing each other in the ribs and whispering to each other "Look at that dumb motherfucker,he's changing it for us."
Old hillbilly thinks to himself: "Dumb fuckers." "They think I"m too stupid to know they are making fun of me." " Too stupid to know that the only reason I am doing this is because I don't want them to screw up this classic car."
City Boy 2: "Let's stop by Bob's house." " Bob's OK but his dad is a urbanized hillbilly."
City Boy 1; " No,he's a dumb motherfucker,"
City Boy 2; " "Yes he's a dumb fuck but there IS a few things those retarded hillbilly's do know." "Heres his house pull in."
Urbanized Hillbilly; "Looks at the car and shakes his head sadly and says; " First off I really would not be driving a classic car in this weather." Secondly; This is a 1969 Mustang and you put the chains on the front tires." " This is a rear wheel drive car, the chains go on the back tires." " Next time y'all do any work on a car go get a Haynes or a Chilton book and read it before you do anything else."
He then gets out his tools and proceeds to to change the chains for them.
Both city boys start jabbing each other in the ribs and whispering to each other "Look at that dumb motherfucker,he's changing it for us."
Old hillbilly thinks to himself: "Dumb fuckers." "They think I"m too stupid to know they are making fun of me." " Too stupid to know that the only reason I am doing this is because I don't want them to screw up this classic car."
by OneWhoKnowsBetter December 25, 2012
Get the Urbanized Hillbillymug.