OD Smith's definitions

david beckham

Overrated (beyond belief) player with more limitations than you can shake a stick at, but for some reason Sven Goran Eriksson believes he is perfect material for the England captaincy. This ignores the fact he's NEVER captained a team, even at schoolboy level, and believes being England captain means you're supposed to take penalties, no matter how far over the bar they regularly go.

Used to be famous for being married to Posh Spice, but now it's the other way 'round. Now he's famous for shagging women that aren't Posh Spice, giving his children names that ensure years of bullying, and being gnerally useless on the pitch - if and when he gets on it when you consider his standing at Real Madrid.

Any time he's on the front page of the tabloids/Hello for being famous, as opposed to demonstrating any form of footballing ability WHATSOEVER.

by OD Smith March 31, 2005

Jurassic Park

A pretty good book, a pretty average film, and some pretty bad sequels.

Welcome to Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen...

"Wait a minute, why did Crichton's follow up book, The Lost World, seem to change what happened to most of the characters to fit in with the events of the first film?"

by OD Smith April 12, 2005

fued

Somebody on a message board, mostly wrestling ones, showing their level of intellect by talking about two wrestlers having a "fued", rather than a feud which they are actually having.

Normally I wouldn't mind, but it seems there are hundreds of people that can't spell the damn word right, so I'm doing them a favour.

"i hope we see and exciting fued between jbl and john cena." - Bad spelling, bad grammar, and a complete inability to spot a talented wrestler in favour for a couple of really bad ones.

by OD Smith June 20, 2005

Anna Kournikova

For several years, the most famous Russian sportsperson for her exploits (or lack thereof) on the tennis courts. In fact, she earned far more money through advertising deals due to being extraordinarily sexy indeed and looking good advertising sports bras and having FHM shoots than anything she did on court. Mainly as she, famously, never won a single tournament but regularly packed the courts at Wimbledon when playing, before retiring at the age of 23.

The success of Maria Sharapova, fit and a good player with a Wimbledon victory aged 19 in 2004 ended comparisons very quickly indeed.

"Come on Anna!" - The average Wimbledon spectator, either showing his support of projecting his sexual fantasy. Probably both.

by OD Smith July 3, 2005

Leona Lewis

Simon Cowell's Weapon of Mass Destruction - who appears to be getting whiter.

Since we seemed to have cloned her with Alexandra Burke, I guess we have to make Leona Lewis whiter.

by OD Smith December 27, 2008

marilyn manson

The easiest person for The Daily Mail to blame for whatever is wrong with today's society.

Marilyn Manson inspired the Columbine kids to shoot up their High School.

Marilyn Manson influenced Luke Mitchell to kill Jodi Jones.

by OD Smith February 16, 2005

Kano Sisters

AKA Kano Shimai.

Japan's answer to the Hilton Sisters, although neither of them are as irritating and overexposed as Paris, and they've been around for a few years.

Multitasking between acting, singing, modelling and generally turning up everywhere, Mika and Kyoko are at the pinnacle of Japan's star system.

Does anyone know the Japanese for "Oh look, it's The Kano Sisters?!?

by OD Smith May 15, 2005