Nutzen YerMouf's definitions
When you are feeling fine then suddenly you feel the urge to poop NOW! The poop pops out of nowhere, often leaving your friends, family, or coworkers wondering why you are running to the bathroom as quick as you can. Most cases of pop-tart poop ends with barely making it to the toilet with shitting while you are pulling your pants down. Some of the worst cases end with embarrassingly hiding your underwear from your wife in the washer, and a few people wondering why the odd brown stain on the ground in the hallway.
Dan was in a meeting going over 4th quarter financials with his boss and several coworkers. Suddenly his eyes got really big and he ran out of the meeting as quick as he could. When he came back, his boss asked what was wrong.
Dan said, "A case of the pop-tart poops, I was afraid I would shit my pants."
His boss answered, "I hate it when that happens."
Dan said, "A case of the pop-tart poops, I was afraid I would shit my pants."
His boss answered, "I hate it when that happens."
by Nutzen YerMouf January 12, 2018
Get the pop-tart poopmug. Noun: Dark, sticky, bloody feces. A medical term describing dark tarry stools containing decomposing blood that can be an indication of bleeding in the digestive tract or esophagus
Proper Noun: A girls name, originating from Greece
Proper Noun: A girls name, originating from Greece
Melena went to her doctors to drop off her stool sample. Upon seeing the sample, the doctor said, "Melena!"
Melena said, "What?"
The doctored answered, "No, your stool is Melana. See how dark and bloody it is. I think you have a problem and it is more than your unfortunate name."
Melena said, "What?"
The doctored answered, "No, your stool is Melana. See how dark and bloody it is. I think you have a problem and it is more than your unfortunate name."
by Nutzen YerMouf June 13, 2017
Get the Melanamug. Albert said, "Yeah I told him he was a regular Benjamin Einstein. He got a big smile on his face and thanked me."
Thomas said laughing, "So did he really think gluing lube to his hand would allow him to masturbate anywhere?"
"Think it! He had already done it!"
"hahahaha"
Thomas said laughing, "So did he really think gluing lube to his hand would allow him to masturbate anywhere?"
"Think it! He had already done it!"
"hahahaha"
by Nutzen YerMouf February 9, 2018
Get the Benjamin Einsteinmug. When one consumes too many chicken wings and develops a case of explosive diarrhea. This often requires a change of pants and underwear as the afflicted cannot make it to the bathroom quick enough.
Edwards friend Jacob set him up on a blind date with Ashley. Ashley was hot, and apparently a bit of a whore. Edward knew he was getting lucky tonight. The evening went well, Edward gobbled down about two dozen Buffalo wings. Drank a little, chatted with Ashley. They couple danced a bit in the bar, he was sure he was getting lucky tonight. Then.... his stomach started aching.
"I have a feeling I am about to make some Buffalo Chocolate", Edward said to his date.
Then it happened, Edwards bowels exploded all over the inside of his pants. Liquid shit leaked out of his pant legs and on to the floor.
"Gross!" Ashley said.
Edward, did not get laid that night.
"I have a feeling I am about to make some Buffalo Chocolate", Edward said to his date.
Then it happened, Edwards bowels exploded all over the inside of his pants. Liquid shit leaked out of his pant legs and on to the floor.
"Gross!" Ashley said.
Edward, did not get laid that night.
by Nutzen YerMouf June 9, 2017
Get the Buffalo Chocolatemug. Mythology that people believe is true, but with a twist of their own personal biases. Similar to religion, but religion is organized. This would be less organized beliefs that have no basis in fact, and include a belief in ghosts or the supernatural, bigfoot, ancient aliens, that vaccines cause autism, the Earth is flat, the Earth is 5,000 years old, or Jesus came to America.
Many adherents of these beliefs claim to trust science, but cherry-pick what they call science. They often refer to others as "sheeple" and insist that others need to "wake-up" because they did their "research" ("research" is code for googling until you found something that matches your beliefs).
Many adherents of these beliefs claim to trust science, but cherry-pick what they call science. They often refer to others as "sheeple" and insist that others need to "wake-up" because they did their "research" ("research" is code for googling until you found something that matches your beliefs).
Jill's child got autism, but she did not vaccinate because she believed in anti-vax lornge. She was not sure what to blame, so she did her "research" and on the third page, found an article by natural douchebag news blaming GMO's. "It must be the chemicals, she thought"
by Nutzen YerMouf July 8, 2017
Get the Lorngemug. Origin: Latin nasus, nose
adjective: telenasic
The psychic ability to smell something without being physically present to smell it.
adjective: telenasic
The psychic ability to smell something without being physically present to smell it.
1) Frank had the telenasus ability. He could watch a porn on his computer, focus intently on the woman's vagina, and use his telenasic ability to smell the vagina. He loved it most of the time, but sometimes the woman in the porn was not so fresh smelling or he would catch a whiff of penis or anus.
2) Johnny hated having telenasus. Someone on the other side of his office could fart and he would be able to smell it. When watched TV he has to put nose plugs because whenever the actors would be in an area that stank, Johnny could smell it. Every dumpster, every rank body that hadn't showered and spent all day under hot lights, all of it. He knows which actors don't brush their teeth and which ones need to wash their balls more. It was a curse.
2) Johnny hated having telenasus. Someone on the other side of his office could fart and he would be able to smell it. When watched TV he has to put nose plugs because whenever the actors would be in an area that stank, Johnny could smell it. Every dumpster, every rank body that hadn't showered and spent all day under hot lights, all of it. He knows which actors don't brush their teeth and which ones need to wash their balls more. It was a curse.
by Nutzen YerMouf May 10, 2018
Get the telenasusmug. Euphemism for a female masturbating.
It is derived from the shape of the American state of Oklahoma and its resemblance to a hand with a protruding finger that can be used to stimulate the vaginal cavity.
It is derived from the shape of the American state of Oklahoma and its resemblance to a hand with a protruding finger that can be used to stimulate the vaginal cavity.
"Well, Johnny canceled our date to go take care of his sick mom," Elizabeth complained.
"That asshole!" her friend Jayden exclaimed.
"I was fucking horny too," Elizabeth replied.
"You can always take Mister Oklahoma out tonight."
"That asshole!" her friend Jayden exclaimed.
"I was fucking horny too," Elizabeth replied.
"You can always take Mister Oklahoma out tonight."
by Nutzen YerMouf February 17, 2018
Get the Mister Oklahomamug.