Nutzen YerMouf's definitions
The fat stupid guy at work that sucks up to the boss, spouts simplistic platitudes, and thinks he is more experienced because he has worked there 20 years but you always seem to be fixing his fuck ups.
The office chimp at work came over to help me. I just wanted him to get away from me because he annoys me and he fucks things up all the time.
"There's no 'I' in team, that's what I always say." The office chimp stated.
Just to be a dick to him and hopefully drive him away, I brought up Maureen's promotion that he was hoping to get.
"It's okay, good things come to those who wait. I will get it next time." The office chimp replied.
Jesus fucking Christ, I thought to myself. Would you just go the fuck away.
Our boss walked by, and the office chimp stopped what he was doing and fucked up the order of my documents in the process.
"How are you doing today Frank?" the office chimp said overly cheerful.
Frank answered, "Good, glad to see you helping out over here."
"Got to teach these young guys, I have been here 20 years and they can learn a lot from me. Of course the people are our most important asset too! We wouldn't be anywhere without them and we need to step in and show we appreciate them." the fucking moron office chimp said.
"There's no 'I' in team, that's what I always say." The office chimp stated.
Just to be a dick to him and hopefully drive him away, I brought up Maureen's promotion that he was hoping to get.
"It's okay, good things come to those who wait. I will get it next time." The office chimp replied.
Jesus fucking Christ, I thought to myself. Would you just go the fuck away.
Our boss walked by, and the office chimp stopped what he was doing and fucked up the order of my documents in the process.
"How are you doing today Frank?" the office chimp said overly cheerful.
Frank answered, "Good, glad to see you helping out over here."
"Got to teach these young guys, I have been here 20 years and they can learn a lot from me. Of course the people are our most important asset too! We wouldn't be anywhere without them and we need to step in and show we appreciate them." the fucking moron office chimp said.
by Nutzen YerMouf May 9, 2018
Get the office chimpmug. Tom wanted to get revenge on his roomate Adam. So early in the morning before work, Tom pretended to be taking a shit. While in the bathroom, he grabbed Adam's toothbrush and gave it a bit of salty toothpaste.
A little while later, Adam was brushing his teeth. "Did this toothpaste taste salty to you Tom?" Adam yelled from the bathroom.
Tom giggled quietly before answering back, "I didn't notice, maybe it's the baking soda"
"You son of a bitch Tom! You put salty toothpaste on my toothbrush" Adam yelled
Tom just laughed.
A little while later, Adam was brushing his teeth. "Did this toothpaste taste salty to you Tom?" Adam yelled from the bathroom.
Tom giggled quietly before answering back, "I didn't notice, maybe it's the baking soda"
"You son of a bitch Tom! You put salty toothpaste on my toothbrush" Adam yelled
Tom just laughed.
by Nutzen YerMouf June 10, 2017
Get the Salty toothpastemug. A person who creates an Urban Dictionary word for their friend, enemy, girlfriend, boyfriend, or themselves.
Samples:
"*name* is the best person in the world"
"*name* is the cutest boy ever"
"*name* is a faggot asshole"
"*name* is an ultra-cool dude"
"*name* is the most loyal and prettiest girl"
Samples:
"*name* is the best person in the world"
"*name* is the cutest boy ever"
"*name* is a faggot asshole"
"*name* is an ultra-cool dude"
"*name* is the most loyal and prettiest girl"
That stupid dic thought he could get in that girl's pants by creating an Urban Dictionary reference for her name. Now the rest of us have to deal with stupid ass definitions in Urban Dictionary. It is time for an Urban dic cleaning.
by Nutzen YerMouf February 21, 2018
Get the stupid dicmug. A metal hanger, usually kept in bathrooms, that is used to break up chunks of fecal matter that may plug the toilet.
"Brian! Brian! I plugged your guy's toilet up."
Brian responds, "Why didn't you use the poop hanger?"
"Poop hanger? What the fuck is that?"
Brian answers, " We keep it on the back of the toilet. You use it to break up large turds so the toilet doesn't plug up"
"That's fucking gross. Get a plunger like a normal person."
Brian responds, "Why didn't you use the poop hanger?"
"Poop hanger? What the fuck is that?"
Brian answers, " We keep it on the back of the toilet. You use it to break up large turds so the toilet doesn't plug up"
"That's fucking gross. Get a plunger like a normal person."
by Nutzen YerMouf May 8, 2018
Get the poop hangermug.