Name removed by the NSA's definitions

Ewoks

Ewoks are teddy-bear like creatures from Star Wars that live on the planet Endor.

But do not be fooled by their cuteness. These badass little motherfuckers will fuck you up. And just when you think they're done fucking you up, they'll fuck you up again.

There is a reason why you don't see any other animals on Endor; because the Ewoks fucking killed them all. And the ones that they didn't kill are too scared of getting their fucking skins ripped off to show themselves. Nothing on Endor breathes without the Ewoks' permission. Once, they found a Jedi, and they tried to COOK HIM. Then, they encountered an entire legion of the Empire's best troops, and they kicked their asses using nothing but rocks, logs, and a few catapults.

Never mess with an Ewok. They will kill you, and play drums with your FUCKING SKULL. At least, if one of 'em doesn't decide to use it as a HAT.

a: Oh look, Ewoks!

Ewoks: Oh look, dinner!

by Name removed by the NSA January 3, 2014

Atheist

A person who tries to prove the non-existence of an entity that resides outside of the universe using the laws of the universe

There is nothing wrong with being Atheist. This is just my opinion.

by Name removed by the NSA November 15, 2013

Twilight

The most famous keyboard slam of all time

Girl- want to watch twilight?

Boy- sure! *shoots himself*

by Name removed by the NSA December 5, 2013

banana seeds

1. Seeds of the Banana fruit

2. Semen

1. When I was young, I was so picky I would try to take out all the banana seeds from the banana.

2. I planted some banana seeds in her last night.

by Name removed by the NSA December 17, 2013

Anal cavity search

What airport security officers do to you if you blink wrong.

Imagine a group of people putting gloves on and taking turns shoving it really far up your ass.

Airport cop: Name?

b: {very arabic name}

Airport cop: Come with me, please.

b: God dammit, it's an anal cavity search, isn't it?

Airport cop: Don't worry, we're only violating a COUPLE of your rights..

*glove snaps*

by Name removed by the NSA January 3, 2014

Lol

1. Abbreviation for "Laugh out Loud". Substitution for laughter.

2. How girls on the internet let guys know that they do anal

1. A- why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from your mother's ugly face!

B- What's the difference between your penis and your jokes? Nobody laughs at your jokes.

C- lol

A- F**k you

B- lol

D- lol

2. See slut

by Name removed by the NSA December 5, 2013

One direction

Proof that you can take a dump, call it a song, slap some pretty faces on it, and get famous from it.

Also proof that said dump can be fought over by clingy bitches all over the world.

Harry: Come on, Liam, we'll be late!

Liam: Just hold up, I'm writing our next One direction song.

*Takes large and painful dump*

by Name removed by the NSA December 5, 2013