Mr. Softey's definitions
The perplexing conundrums that arise from leaving evidence of a recent masturbation session laying about.
Conrad: Holy crap! We've got to go back to the apartment before Pam wakes up, I forgot I left a bunch of used kleenex by the computer!
Farnsworth: Hey, your tissue issues aren't going to make me late to work, Sgt. Spank-o-tron!
Farnsworth: Hey, your tissue issues aren't going to make me late to work, Sgt. Spank-o-tron!
by Mr. Softey February 4, 2009
Get the tissue issues mug.A room that is awash with a lingering, beefy aroma that is usually associated with the massive ingestion of meat products and the flatulence produced by them.
"Let's try to stay upwind of Beeftown until the fog clears."
"The mayor of Beeftown shits on a throne of lies."
"Welcome to Beeftown, population: you."
"Mauro and his family are summering in Beeftown and they're having quite a lovely time."
"The mayor of Beeftown shits on a throne of lies."
"Welcome to Beeftown, population: you."
"Mauro and his family are summering in Beeftown and they're having quite a lovely time."
by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
Get the Beeftown mug.A card player who has amassed a large collection of, mostly red poker chips. Since reds are the lowest valued chip, it makes you look like you have a lot of money when you really don't.
"Another massive three dollar pot taken down by Johnny Redchips!"
"Can anybody break a five? Johnny Redchips is cashing out."
"You see my dollar and raise me a quarter? Why, that's too rich for my blood, Johnny Redchips!"
"Can anybody break a five? Johnny Redchips is cashing out."
"You see my dollar and raise me a quarter? Why, that's too rich for my blood, Johnny Redchips!"
by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
Get the Johnny Redchips mug.An ungodly brick of pink popcorn that is case hardened and sold to the unknowing masses at the circus, carnival, fair, etc.
by Mr. Softey January 26, 2009
Get the circus popcorn mug.Gaylord: "Did you hear they legalized gay marriage in California?"
Armande: "Good for them, that's fruitastic!"
Gaylord: "Not to change the subject, but what do you think of the paisley ascot I'm wearing."
Armande: "That too, is fruitastic."
Armande: "Good for them, that's fruitastic!"
Gaylord: "Not to change the subject, but what do you think of the paisley ascot I'm wearing."
Armande: "That too, is fruitastic."
by Mr. Softey January 26, 2009
Get the Fruitastic mug.An exclamation one yells out when, upon turning on the telly, you are unpleasantly surprised by the presence of a horrid Jean-Claude Van Damme movie.
"Jean-Claude God Damn! I give one lousy thumbs up to a Chuck Norris flick, and now my Tivo is infested with this asshole!"
"Jean-Claude God Damn! If they rerun Timecop one more time I'm going on a killing spree"
"Jean-Claude God Damn! If they rerun Timecop one more time I'm going on a killing spree"
by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
Get the Jean-Claude God Damn mug.A scientific theory which explains that regularly eating butter, even a small pat, will eventually turn you into a fat butterball.
At the 10 year High School Reunion.....
Gerard: Hey check out Sylvia, she's a total hefer! She used to be hot, what happened?
Chuck: Dude, It's called the Butterball Effect, all those empty fat calories have wreaked their damnable havoc on her once fine physique.
Gerard: Say what now?
Gerard: Hey check out Sylvia, she's a total hefer! She used to be hot, what happened?
Chuck: Dude, It's called the Butterball Effect, all those empty fat calories have wreaked their damnable havoc on her once fine physique.
Gerard: Say what now?
by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009
Get the Butterball Effect mug.