by Mr. Cardboard November 07, 2011
The natural lubricant of the anus, designed to enable shit to slide out more easily but which also facilitates the insertion of golf balls.
"I was holding in a shit all last period but it turned out to just be a huge fart, however I wiped anyway in case some marmalade had come out."
by Mr. Cardboard November 07, 2011
1) Taking mind altering substances right before a wordy exam that requires you to express an opinion - such as philosophy or english literature, enhancing your ability to plumb the depths of the mind and/or lowering your inhibitions enough to say what you really think, whilst either enhancing or diminishing your ability to actually write it down.
2) Letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.
3) A test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
2) Letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.
3) A test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
1) I can't believe I got an A in religious studies, I scored some bud an hour before the exam and had a sly toke to keep me calm but it just made me so much more able to refute things eloquently.
2) Dave! Long time no see, fancy a line? This is great stuff man I've been on it for weeks.
3) "All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
"Um, I'm the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. And I take drugs. My team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. What exactly is the point of this test?"
"All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
2) Dave! Long time no see, fancy a line? This is great stuff man I've been on it for weeks.
3) "All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
"Um, I'm the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. And I take drugs. My team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. What exactly is the point of this test?"
"All employees will have a drug test on Monday"
by Mr. Cardboard October 31, 2011
Sarah Silverman: "I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion. And it turns out I was just thirsty.”
by Mr. Cardboard November 06, 2011
Dude 1: Congrats on finally getting a job.
Dude 2: Thanks, I'm sure gonna miss having beereakfast though.
Dude 2: Thanks, I'm sure gonna miss having beereakfast though.
by Mr. Cardboard November 07, 2011
The logical response to being called a motherfucker. Being called "motherfucker" implies that you fuck your own mother and is generally considered the highest insult one can bestow.
By immediately responding "dadshagger" one temporarily confuses one's literary opponent as to whether it would be worse to shag their dad or fuck their mother and whether they have in fact been semantically bested. Erstwhile, thou positions thine foot squarely betwixt their thighs with such vehemence as to render them infertile for the rest of their sorry ass life.
By immediately responding "dadshagger" one temporarily confuses one's literary opponent as to whether it would be worse to shag their dad or fuck their mother and whether they have in fact been semantically bested. Erstwhile, thou positions thine foot squarely betwixt their thighs with such vehemence as to render them infertile for the rest of their sorry ass life.
by Mr. Cardboard November 06, 2011
Ponce: Schedule a meeting through my PA.
Human: PA?
Ponce: Personal Assistant.
Human: You mean your assistant?
Human: PA?
Ponce: Personal Assistant.
Human: You mean your assistant?
by Mr. Cardboard November 08, 2011