Mr Ben's definitions

featherweight

An obnoxious teenager who pretends to be blind-drunk after unwittingly drinking a plain Red Bull, expecting vodka or Jack Daniels to be mixed inside.

"Leah is such a featherweight, it's embarrassing!"

by Mr Ben February 8, 2005

Red October

Named after the famous Russian submarine, Red Octobers are those once-in-a-lifetime turds that block the toilet. You can't flush them, you can't deal with them in the normal way. Toilet paper is a serious no-no with regards to Red Octobers as this merely increases the "gross" factor by twelve. If you see a Red October, the chances are that you'll need to call the emergency services.

"Mum! Can you call the Fire Bridgade, we've got a Red October here! I've tried the shower head but that doesn't work. Make sure they bring their bio-hazard suits this time!"

by Mr Ben February 7, 2005

black holes

Black holes are rarely seen creatures that operate in the shadows. If anything is left lying around or falls off a table, a black hole might (for they are decreasing in number) run past and swallow it up. The reasons for them doing so are unknown but what is odd is that some of them redeposit what they've swallowed at a different location. Not to be confused with thieving gypsy bastards.

"Has anyone seen my pen?" - typical response after a black hole feeding session.

by Mr Ben February 9, 2005

mister

A title used informally to signify respect between two people but without actually meaning it.

"What time do you call this, Mister Ben?"

by Mr Ben February 7, 2005

McCinsey

The absolute worst form of something. The opposite of the Real McCoy - if it's the Real McCinsey, you're fucked mister!

"This pizza is total McCinsey! I want my money back, bitch!"

by Mr Ben February 7, 2005

hippo

1. A large amphibious land animal, looking like a fat, gray, leathery horse. They have a huge mouth with missing teeth and a foul temper. Do not approach or feed.

2. A fat woman dressing up in clothes several sizes to small. Do not approach of feed.

1. "And now we see the hippo in their natural habitat..."

2. "God damn, that bitch is a right hippo!"

by Mr Ben February 9, 2005

sluce

That horrible oil that gathers around the edge of a dinner plate whilst eating badly-cooked or cheap canteen food. Unnaturally red or yellow in colour and about as good for your health as a heart attack.

"Hey chef! What's all this sluce doing here?"

by Mr Ben February 7, 2005