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Mickey Darling's definitions

Telepathetic Powers

a syndrome known for its vast fake results in predicting the

future or failure in assisting law enforcement in finding a

stunt purse at sketch pad

usually ran in infomercials at 3am and prone to make

believers of weak minds in upper class flap traps

doing the Prozac Shuffle .
dude, my telepathetic powers need a boost, put some toothpaste on my cig so i can get a clearer view of the future.
by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009
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an expression used to define a dumb or retarded action.
that boy is so stupid he must have stepped in a puddle of dumbass before he came to work.
by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009
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pencil jockeying

when an overpaid lawyer deliberately manipulates paperwork so that a client is dismissed of his/her charges and walks away from a situation that they were guilty of.
Can you believe all the pencil jockeying that goes on in the american judicial system today?
by Mickey Darling August 4, 2009
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space biscuits

some of the most potent Lysergic acid diethylamide (LSD)
on the black market.

this shit will send you

straddling the fence to the spirit world status in the blink of an eye.
what's wrong with Prox?

i think he ate too many space biscuits, homie is so fucked up he is stitching quilts with Tommy Chong.
by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009
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twoday

an expression used when asking time off from work to cover yourself for two days, not today, because you are going to get so wasted, you'll be straddling the fence.
Worker : hey boss, can i have off twoday?

Boss: do you mean today?

did you spill some dumbass on yourself

Worker: no twoday because i'm gonna get so wasted, i'll need two days to cover me.
by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009
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stitching quilts

permanent brain damage that occurs from too much drug abuse and leaves you so fucked up that you appear to be in a perpetual state of stitching quilts.
what's wrong with Bryan?

homie fried his brains so much on that shit that he just sits on the porch stitching quilts with his grandma while she be

straddling the fence.
by Mickey Darling August 3, 2009
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Rocky Road

a sexual maneuver in which one accidently corn holes his bro in the dark while making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with the crust cut off on your girlfriend.
Bro, what are you doing, that's my ass, not hers, and now that you know, why are you still Rocky Roading me??!!!
by Mickey Darling August 2, 2009
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