Michael Zeleny's definitions

lit-critter

A term of disparagement applied to a literary critic, implying the character traits of an overeducated shithead. Usually tarred with the postmodern brush as "pomo lit-critter".

"Dang! We are beset by lit-critters! Let loose toxic sarcasm!"

"Bill Clinton did his turn as a pomo lit-critter by testifying on the ambiguity of the word 'is'."

by Michael Zeleny December 19, 2006

Fertiloser

A chronic loser with an extra short life expectancy.

Hamas is breeding generations of fertilosers to enrich the soil of Palestine.

by Michael Zeleny June 16, 2024

shart

Anal counterpart to a French kiss.

Monsieur Raggou: Who can see my shart? Here be my doublet come close, my coat come over all dat, den who de devil see my shart? For vat sall me have a shart, when nobody see my shart?
--John Lacy, The Old Troop, before 1665

by Michael Zeleny June 23, 2008

S.H.P.O.S.

Designation as a Sub-Human Piece Of Shit, applied by medical personnel in hospitals to their less-than-desirable patients.

In an article published in Values, Ethics, and Health Care, 5 (1980), pp. 226-228, Harold Schwartz attests that S.H.P.O.S. is "an acronym for 'subhuman piece of shit' applied by medical interns and residents to their most unpleasant and uncooperative patients."

by Michael Zeleny January 27, 2008

walking spanish

Ambulatory locomotion of the recipient of the bum's rush, involuntarily emulating a Flamenco dancer by dint of being simultaneously propelled forward and elevated at the seat of one's pants with one hand, and the scruff of one's neck with another. The expression recalls the supposed "custom of pirates, in the Spanish Main, of forcing prisoners wo walk while holding them by the neck so that their toes barely touched the deck." (Robert L. Chapman)

...and every Thursday night the hotel has a bloody cabaret in the bar, featuring a tiny emaciated dago with nine-inch hips and some bloated fat tart with her hair brylcreemed down and a big arse presenting Flamenco for Foreigners.
-- Monty Python's Flying Circus

by Michael Zeleny February 11, 2004

P.P.P.P.P.T.

A medical acronym for "Piss Poor Protoplasm Poorly Put Together".

That P.P.P.P.P.T. is C.T.D.

by Michael Zeleny January 27, 2008

S.W.I.S.S.

Salesmen's motivational acronym for "Sell What's In Stock, Stupid".

Boards bearing the logo S.W.I.S.S. can be found in the back rooms of Verizon stores across the U.S.A.

by Michael Zeleny January 26, 2008