Michael Zeleny's definitions

shart

Anal counterpart to a French kiss.

Monsieur Raggou: Who can see my shart? Here be my doublet come close, my coat come over all dat, den who de devil see my shart? For vat sall me have a shart, when nobody see my shart?
--John Lacy, The Old Troop, before 1665

by Michael Zeleny June 23, 2008

walking spanish

Ambulatory locomotion of the recipient of the bum's rush, involuntarily emulating a Flamenco dancer by dint of being simultaneously propelled forward and elevated at the seat of one's pants with one hand, and the scruff of one's neck with another. The expression recalls the supposed "custom of pirates, in the Spanish Main, of forcing prisoners wo walk while holding them by the neck so that their toes barely touched the deck." (Robert L. Chapman)

...and every Thursday night the hotel has a bloody cabaret in the bar, featuring a tiny emaciated dago with nine-inch hips and some bloated fat tart with her hair brylcreemed down and a big arse presenting Flamenco for Foreigners.
-- Monty Python's Flying Circus

by Michael Zeleny February 11, 2004

S.H.P.O.S.

Designation as a Sub-Human Piece Of Shit, applied by medical personnel in hospitals to their less-than-desirable patients.

In an article published in Values, Ethics, and Health Care, 5 (1980), pp. 226-228, Harold Schwartz attests that S.H.P.O.S. is "an acronym for 'subhuman piece of shit' applied by medical interns and residents to their most unpleasant and uncooperative patients."

by Michael Zeleny January 27, 2008

P.P.P.P.P.T.

A medical acronym for "Piss Poor Protoplasm Poorly Put Together".

That P.P.P.P.P.T. is C.T.D.

by Michael Zeleny January 27, 2008

nakkin

A skirt patterened after the blue & white checkered napkin material favored by the lady on the "Aunt Jemima" Pancake Box.

THING-FISH:
(pointing to his skirt)
(Fo' those of you unfamiliar wit de' nakkin,
Dis be de nakkin'!)
Frank Zappa, Thing-Fish

by Michael Zeleny February 11, 2004

Fertiloser

A chronic loser with an extra short life expectancy.

Hamas is breeding generations of fertilosers to enrich the soil of Palestine.

by Michael Zeleny June 16, 2024

plook

To engage in nonorthogenital forms of sexual penetration lending themselves to consecutive reciprocity between partners.

JOE:
This is exciting
I never plooked
A tiny chrome-plated machine
That looks like a magical pig
With marital aids stuck all over it
Such as yourself before
SY BORG:
You'll love it!
Its a way of life.
JOE:
Does that mean maybe later
You'll plook me....
Frank Zappa, Joe's Garage

by Michael Zeleny February 11, 2004