Metallicajunkie's definitions

Valentine's Day

Another excuse for your wife/girlfriend/fiancee to get mad at you for not buying them something

Matt: How'd your Valentine's Day go Dave?
Dave: I forgot to buy my wife a present, and she's told me to go jump off a bridge
Matt: Ouch........

by Metallicajunkie September 30, 2018

Coffin Jockey

A slang term for a dead body, first coined by Plankton from the cartoon series Spongebob Squarepants, in the episode Pest of the West

It's hard working in a morgue, amongst a bunch of coffin jockeys, but at least the pay is good

by Metallicajunkie October 24, 2018

Helium Tank

A term used to describe a woman who can expel air through her vagina with so much force, she's capable of blowing up a balloon by doing so, it's not recommended you pop said balloon afterwards, unless you wanna risk having the smart of a front butt fart hit your nostrils

Amy is a total helium tank, I don't know how she does it, but that broad is talented!

by Metallicajunkie September 30, 2018

Beef

It's when you need two gats to go to sleep, it's when your mom ain't safe up in the streets, it's when I see you, guaranteed to be in ICU, it's when you make your enemies start your jeep, it's when you role no less then 30 deep, it's when I see you, guaranteed to be in ICU

Ask yourself, do you know what beef is?

by Metallicajunkie October 16, 2018

Suicide

A permanent answer to a temporary problem that does endless amounts more damage then it fixes

I heard you tried to commit suicide, please talk to me, how can I help you?

by Metallicajunkie October 8, 2018

Alpaca

An animal that (according to Joe Gatto from Impractical Jokers) looks something like a fake emu

I prefer alpaca wool over llama wool any day

by Metallicajunkie September 30, 2018

Hurricane Michael

A hurricane that coincidentally occurred on October of this year, a number of days before the new Halloween reboot movie is set to come out

Hurricane Michael is approaching! Pack up your shit and bail out!

by Metallicajunkie October 10, 2018