Matt.....'s definitions

mac user

Somebody who uses an Apple/Macintosh computer. There are two kinds of Mac users

1. The Mac user who uses a Mac because s/he has to. They probably work in the editing, developing, and/or scientific communities and use a Mac because the software that works best for what they do just so happens to run on OS X. Far less obnoxious than your stereotypical Mac user (see below) and while they may enjoy working on an Apple, they probably would probably switch to Windows or Linux without complaint if they needed.

2. Also known as a Mactard or a Macfag, these are the users who are obsessed to the point of cult-status. They buy Apple products because they're made by Apple, they spend all day bashing Windows because "Micro$oft is evil!" will try to convert everyone within eyesight to the cult of Mac, and go to bed after praying to Steve Jobs. Everything they do on a Mac they can do on Windows, but they don't want to be like everyone else so they choose what their former friends didn't use. If they had to use Windows, even for a minute, they'd gripe and complain the entire time.

1. "After you're done working on that mRNA strand in Geneious, drag and drop it into EnzymeX to find the right enzyme for that BON1 strand you took the RNA from."

2. "Yeah, I'm a Mac user, and I love it. You use Windows? Don't you know that Win-DOSE has over 100,000 viruses?! Switch to Apple, you won't get viruses, nor will you have to worry about adware or spyware or having to help Bill Gates buy another house! Also, look how pretty the graphics are! Sure, you can run Photoshop on Windows, and sure I use Microsoft Office on this, but they run sooooo much better on a Mac!"

by Matt..... February 27, 2007

Olympics

An sporting event originating in Greece as an honor to the gods. In more modern times it has become an international sporting contest were most of the world's countries participate every four years. The athletes selected to participate are their country's cream of the crop and represent their home nation with unparalleled pride. Being awarded a medal means you are one of the best athletes in the world. A pure and true athletic spectacle that has unfortunately received less popularity in recent years.

The true, original definition of athleticism originated at the ancient Olympics. Being allowed to represent your country is considered the ultimate goal for almost every athlete in the world.

by Matt..... October 4, 2008

Foot massage

The rubbing and massaging of one's feet. Often interpreted as sensual. Something you never give another man's woman.

Vincent: I ain't saying it's right. But you're saying a foot massage don't mean nothing, and I'm saying it does. Now look, I've given a million ladies a million foot massages, and they all meant something. We act like they don't, but they do, and that's what's so fucking cool about them. There's a sensuous thing going on where you don't talk about it, but you know it, she knows it, fucking Marsellus knew it, and Antwone should have fucking better known better. I mean, that's his fucking wife, man. He can't be expected to have a sense of humor about that shit. You know what I'm saying?

Jules: That's an interesting point. Come on, let's get into character.

by Matt..... March 7, 2011

Warwick

German bass guitar company. Warwicks use exotic woods, typically without finish, and unusual designs to achieve a more growling tone. Prices range from about $1,000 to over $10,000 for more limited release models. Also has a line of cheaper, lesser quality basses called "RockBass."

A Warwick Streamer Stage II will run you about $4800 for a 4 string model, whereas a Corvette Standard will only cost about $1200.

by Matt..... October 15, 2008

bench jockey

A negative way of describing someone in the scientific field who spends a vast majority of his or her time in front of a bench or lab station performing mundane and repetitive tasks. The typical entry level position for college graduates who enter a science job and how disgruntled lab techs refer to themselves. Those who do well are typically promoted to a supervisory or managerial position before going on to get an advanced degree such as an MBA or PhD.

Billy got a bachelors in biology and his first job was working as a low paid bench jockey.

Brian got a masters in biology but still had to start off as a higher paid bench jockey.

Sue got a bachelors in biology and like her colleagues had to start as a bench jockey. After a few years she left to get her MBA and now oversees all of her company's bench jockeys.

by Matt..... April 22, 2011

Moral Orel

A humorous stop-motion show that appeared on adult swim. It centered around Orel, an 11/12 year old church goer who tries to do the right thing by living up to an extreme Protestant ethic. The show itself is a satire of Protestantism, Christianity, morality, and 1950s culture, just to name a few. As the show progressed it began incorporating more dark humor with its episodes. It aired for three seasons before it was denied renewal, most likely due to a combination of the episodes "Nature (part I and II)", "Numb," and "Alone."

Despite how dark Moral Orel ended, it is still a good satire that manages to get good jokes in.

by Matt..... May 25, 2009

bloody mary

A cocktail made from vodka, tomato juice, other spices, and a celery stick. Can also be used as a hangover cure. My recipe is:

1.5 shots vodka
2 shots tomato juice
2 shakes Worcestershire sauce
1 shake Tabasco
dash of horseradish
dash of salt & pepper.

Fill a highball glass with ice. Pour in the vodka, Worcestershire, Tabasco, and tomato juice, and stir with a celery stick. Dash the horseradish, then shake on pepper and salt (if using low-sodium tomato juice). Use the celery stick you stirred with as garnish.

Guy: BARKEEP! Another bloody mary!
Bartender: Dammit, Donnie, you've had 4 already, go home!

by Matt..... April 21, 2007