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Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian's definitions

Careless asshole

1) A person who intentionally likes being an asshole and is also careless.
2) A sketchy person whose behaviours and thoughts towards others are so careless, clumsy, stupid and irresponsible it makes them very asshole-like, even though they aren't intentionally being an asshole. Examples typically include sketchy buyers from your local classifieds, next door neighbors of your sketchy apartment complex, or some incredibly dimwitted kid at school that doesn't know shit.
1) "Man did you see that guy? He is such an asshole, but he's also very careless about his surroundings. Heard he almost got hit by a car once because he wasn't paying attention to the road."

2)

a. Bill had a buyer who bought his old phone. Next day the buyer returned the phone, claiming the screen was "cracked", when in fact it was only the screen protector that was cracked. The buyer returned Bill his money, but kept all the trivial accessories that came with the phone. The phone box had also been severely disfigured for some reason. What would be the point of keeping all those phone accessories when you have no phone? No one knows, but it was clear to Bill that the buyer didn't care about the accessories at all, she was just a complete careless asshole.

b. Johnny's next door neighbor, a pothead and a high school dropout, asked Johnny if he could stay in his apartment for a few hours as his mom kicked him out. Johnny agreed and let him chill there while he went out to eat. A few hours later he came back, finding that his couch was flipped over, his cupboards ransacked, and his vinyl collection was all over the floor with deep scratches in almost every one. The whole apartment reeked of weed, and there was another unpleasant smell coming from the washroom: his toilet seat was covered with diarrhea. "Fucking careless asshole POS..." murmured Johnny as he cleaned up the place.
by Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian September 19, 2019
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Gluck gluck

"Gluck gluck" is an onomatopoeia for the sound of liquid being poured into a container. It does not mean anything else, according to the oxford dictionary of officially recognized words.
Hickory dickory dock. The mouse was thirsty AF.
The clock struck one. The mouse poured some water, and it went gluck gluck, gluck gluck, gluck gluck, gluck gluck.
Hickory dickory dock.

Hickory dickory dock. The mouse was depressed AF.
The clock struck two. The mouse poured some bourbon, and it went gluck gluck, gluck gluck, gluck gluck, gluck gluck.
Hickory dickory dock.
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INTP

INTPs are probably one of the most innocent and dorky creatures ever to roam on this planet. But don't be fooled, under that dorky innocent guise is a very perceptive mind. They have an uncanny ability to acquire knowledge and insight from multiple different perspectives, something that many have trouble doing. Their mind is also a warehouse for storing all sorts of elaborate knowledge pertaining to a certain hobby, interest or field, hence they sometimes may be associated with the nerd/geek stereotype. INTPs are also known for having a very idiosyncratic sense of humor, which can be described as sarcastic, goofy, absurd and even dark. The way an INTP expresses love can also be idiosyncratic. For example, while they might not express love directly, it often gets expressed in more indirect ways such as offering to help with your homework or with your IT problems.

If you ever meet someone who's adorkable, humble and low-key intelligent, they're most likely an INTP.
Friend 1: Dude have you ever met Emmy?

Friend 2: Yeah dude she's so adorkable and wholesome!
Friend 1: She's most definitely an INTP
Friend 2: Fo sure!
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Flat is justice

It's true though. Flat IS justice, anyone who says otherwise clearly doesn't get the appeal. And no I'm not trolling, I am for real. I don't care if not a single man in the world shares my preferences, flat is justice and that is a fact. This is my unwavering conviction til the day I die, so be it!!!
Imagine liking bouncy, buxom, full-figured breasts, like ew. Flat ass and tits are MUCH more elegant looking (not too flat tho). Flat is justice.
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Disney Dad

The best dad there is. He does the most coolest and entertaining things with you and doesn't fret over the littlest things. Literally the opposite of a killjoy. If you have a Disney dad, consider yourself lucky (especially if you're a kid).
Jess: Hey wanna come over to Ben's place tonight? I hear he has a Disney Dad who's doing fun stuff
Taylor: Omg sure, sounds fun!
by Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian October 29, 2021
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Woof

Slang: something you say to express dismay, failure, unattractiveness, surprise or sympathy.

Generally means the same thing as the much later-occurring slang "oof".
A: I just failed my math exam
B: Woof

X: This burger doesn't look anywhere near as good as the ad
Y: Woof! That's an abomination if I've ever seen one.
by Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian November 28, 2021
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Post nasal drip

Something that I suffer with all the time every day of my life, and it friggin sucks. Basically your nose sinuses are so stuffed to the point that the snot "drips" down to your throat, and it makes you gag. Not really a big deal if it happens infrequently, but chronic post nasal drip is literally hell.
Me: Hey guys how's it g— *gags loudly on snot*
Them: Woah you okay there dude?
Me: Oh dw it's nothing, just my typical post nasal drip.
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