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Markwonder's definitions

Smart-ass

What Joe Biden thinks you are if you ask him to lower the U.S. citizens' tax burden.
While visiting Kopp's frozen custard shop in Milwaukee where smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin was on duty, Vice President Joe Biden was sampling some of the tasty treats.

Biden: "What do I owe you for the delicious custard?"

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: “Don’t worry, it’s on the house. … Lower our taxes and we’ll call it even.”

Biden: “Why don’t you say something nice instead of being a Smart–ass all the time?”

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: (Thinking) This motherfucker just lost my vote.
by markwonder August 30, 2010
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Renig

The shift change at the downtown carwash.
Steve noticed that customers were complaining because the blacks were getting lazy and weren't paying proper attention to their assigned duties. It was obviously time to renig.
by markwonder August 21, 2009
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Wiseacre

That Emmet Wickersham is a real wiseacre, I tell you. I caught him stealing checkers off the board while I was looking at Lawrence Welk on the television set." "If he tries that just one more time, I'm calling the nurse."
by Markwonder August 30, 2010
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Shart

When you push too hard to fart and end up shitting your drawers.
Shart philosophy seen on bathroom wall:

Here I sit all broken hearted, came to shit but only farted.
Then one day I took a chance, went to fart and shit my pants.
by Markwonder March 18, 2011
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Hypocrite

A hypocrite is someone who is critical of a certain practice when they themselves are engaging in the very same practice.
Anyone who supports illegal immigration in Arizona yet maintains locks on the doors of their homes and businesses to keep people from just walking in and taking anything they may need to make a better life for themselves or their families is a hypocrite.
by Markwonder May 14, 2010
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Slavery

An institution supported and perpetuated by the Democratic Party right before the civil war. It's true. Look it up.

When Republican Abraham Lincoln became President during the election of 1860 on a platform of ending slavery in the US, many of the slave owning southern Democratic State Officials opted to secede from the Union.

When Abraham Lincoln and the Republican Union finally defeated the Confederates in 1865, many southern Democrat landowners refused to respect the freedom to former slaves and formed the terrorist organization, the KKK.
Brainwashed Liberal: The Republican party hates people of color. They are all about keeping the poor man working in slavery. It's the Democratic party that is a friend of the black man.

Old School Republican: The Republican party is about personal responsibility. You get only what you've worked for and earned. If Democrats had their way they would tax us all into slaves of the government. Open a history book.
by Markwonder September 27, 2011
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Intolerance

Usually practiced by those on the left of the political spectrum when they are confronted with an opinion or belief that is different than theirs.
During the Miss America Pageant, When asked by judge Perez Hilton, an openly gay gossip blogger, whether she believed in gay marriage, Miss California, Carrie Prejean, said "We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite. And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."
Carrie Prejean was sneered and booed at by the audience and confronted with such abject hate and intolerance by the audience and many liberals for her opinion that many of the gay men at the event
wondered aloud why the judges did not discriminate against her for her beliefs. The question came up as to why Carrie Prejean was not thrown out of the competition for her stand on gay marriage.
by markwonder April 20, 2009
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