Mark H's definitions

Cum Brains

Degrading, but fitting name to call a sexually active woman who isn't very intelligent and who has the compulsive habit/desire to give men oral sex.

Your mom: "Mmmmmh, mmmmmh, mmmmmmm."
Plumber: "Ooo yeah! Polish my tool, bitch!"
Your mom: "Mmmmmmm."
Plumber: "Okay you can stop now. I'm gonna "fix your sink" now. *gets out condom and lubricant*"
Your mom: "Mmmmmh yeah, mmmmmh, mmmmmmm, mmmmmh, mmmmmh, mmmmmmmmmmm!"
Plumber: "I said STOP now, Cum Brains!"
Your mom: "Mmm, mmmmmmm?"
Plumber: "You've got a bad case of oral fixation you know."





Mark H. Proud UD author since February 2004.

by Mark H August 21, 2005

sarlacc

(can also be spelled "sarlaac")

The huge sand monster from the movie Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, that Jabba the Hutt tried to feed Han Solo and Luke Skywalker to. The creature is always stationary, lying in wait in its sand pit with its toothy lamprey-like mouth just sticking out, ready to swallow any careless human or animal that tumbles and slips down the sand pit. Tentacles surrounding the mouth grab whatever human or creature they sense nearby and then pull the helpless meal down the Sarlacc's maw. Once the person or creature is swallowed by the monster, he/she/it will undergo a new destination of pain and suffering as he/she/it is slowly digested over 1000 years.

The term "Sarlacc" can also be used to describe any vagina that has a wider diameter than the average diameter of any known vagina. Kinda like the female counterpart of a chode.

1. If Satan was a woman, then her vagina would probably look like a Sarlacc monster.

2. When I was getting laid with my girlfriend, I realized that my penis couldn't fit in tightly because she had a Sarlacc. I could however, fit my whole hand into the wider-than-average vagina, therefore providing her with intense orgasming pleasure, as her G-spot was so goddamn easy to access.

by Mark H September 11, 2004

flesh flower

Slang term for a vagina. The kind of flower that men like to look at.

After I gave her a boquet of flowers to show her my love, my girlfriend then let me lick, play with, and pollinate her flesh flower.

by Mark H September 19, 2004

shove a sock in it

A known way of telling someone to just please shut the fuck up for christ's sake. When you say "Shove a sock in it!" to someone, you are implying that he or she needs to put a sock in his/her mouth to keep him/herself from talking more shit.

(You are laying on your bed relaxing and having a few beers to the point of getting a little drunk while all of a sudden, your little brother bursts in the room acting like a retard and spewing out stupid jokes from his mouth.)

You:(in a somewhat drunken voice) For fuck's sake please *hic* SHOVE A SOCK IN IT!
Your little brother: (shoves a dirty sock down your throat)





Mark H. Adding more terms for "Shut up!" at UrbanDictionary since February 2004.

by Mark H October 18, 2004

Florida Orange Juice Surprise

Somewhat like a Cincinatti Surprise, except that you urinate into a balloon rather than defecate into a pillow case. You then throw the piss-filled balloon(like a water balloon) at someone and then watch as it bursts splattering the piss all over his/her face.

That mime was really boring and getting on everyone's nerves, so I've decided to pull the ol' Florida Orange Juice Surprise on him and watch as his white makeup gets totally ruined, his costume getting stained with piss, and everyone mocking, deriding, and laughing at him.

by Mark H August 24, 2004

skeeball

(v.) To fall on your nuts while on a slippery surface and then slide across the surface while still positioned on your nuts.

(Winter Olympics male figure skating event)

Announcer: ...and there goes Mark with his signature mooove... *jump* *slip* *THUD* *slide* *WHAM* Owww! My goodness! Not only did he fell, he landed on his organs of manhood and then skeeballed across the ice and straight into the wall! Now that really has got to hurt! Well, there goes Mark's third chance to go for gold along with his ability to reproduce!

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Mark H. Proud UrbanDictionary Slang Author since February 2004.

by Mark H August 30, 2006

half of Mexico

Exaggerative slang term for a metric shitload of weed(marijuana).

1. "Well here it is. My new ginormous 2000-liter bong that I bought at the local pawn shop yesterday."
"Whoaly shit dogg! Looks like you can fit half of Mexico in that thing!"

2. (scene from Grand Theft Auto San Andreas)

D.A.: Do you know who you're fucking with here? I'll have your badge you moron!
Cop 1: Shut up! You found anything back there? (Cop 2 is checking out the boot of the D.A.'s car.)
Cop 2: Found anything? He's got half of
Mexico in here! Must be two tons of Mary here!
D.A.: What? But... but I've never seen... how could it have...?
Cop 1: Eloquent defence you got there, buddy.

(source: GameFaqs.com GTA San Andreas game script)





Mark H. Contributing to the drug abuser's slang vocabulary since February 2004.

by Mark H August 22, 2005