Madmann's definitions
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the artmug. by Madmann June 25, 2020
Get the Dgafmug. 1. Originally from the Kevin Smith movie "Dogma". In the film, Cardinal Glick, during his "Catholicism WOW!" campaign to move the church towards a younger, "hipper" demographic, suggest replacing the crucifix with a new image of Christ. This version is grinning like an infomercial host, with one hand thumbs up and one hand doing a phony Hollywood "Bang-bang" gesture. Imagine Jesus if he were subject to Neilsen ratings.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
1. I laughed so hard the first time I saw Buddy Jesus I passed an entire chef salad through my nose!
2. That Dan... he's such a Buddy Jesus... I oughta nail him to something.
2. That Dan... he's such a Buddy Jesus... I oughta nail him to something.
by Madmann October 8, 2005
Get the buddy jesusmug. Some people mistakenly believe this is a term for those over 18. Fraid not. Some people are born grown-ups, and some die at 100 never having acheived this status. If you are one, congratulations on not dying thus far; if not, here's some things you have to look forward to!
• You will cease to be impressed with your 1337speak, pwning people, your h4x0r rep and otherwise talking "liek u r" an illiterate moron. Intelligence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.
• For you emo kids, the world will get brighter for you when you stop crying and get another piece of ass. Life's cyclical in nature, roll with it.
• You will finally understand why your dad always screams when you begin to pay all your own bills. TIP: Pay electricity bill before buying the new GTA.
• Realizing that just because you CAN drink doesn't necessarily make it a good idea. Go out Wednesday, your place of employment might look like the jaws of Hell Thursday morning at 7:00 AM.
• Realizing that your place of employment ALWAYS looks like the jaws of Hell, shrugging and doing what you damn well feel like anyway.
and finally,
• The moment when you are truly no longer a kid, because you can't be. Because you have decided that all kids, without exception, SUCK. Because now YOU have a kid, crying, yelling, wetting the bed, wanting money. Karma's a cruel bitch.
Other than that, it's the only way to be... what else ya gonna do, be a 40 year old skateboarder?
• You will cease to be impressed with your 1337speak, pwning people, your h4x0r rep and otherwise talking "liek u r" an illiterate moron. Intelligence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.
• For you emo kids, the world will get brighter for you when you stop crying and get another piece of ass. Life's cyclical in nature, roll with it.
• You will finally understand why your dad always screams when you begin to pay all your own bills. TIP: Pay electricity bill before buying the new GTA.
• Realizing that just because you CAN drink doesn't necessarily make it a good idea. Go out Wednesday, your place of employment might look like the jaws of Hell Thursday morning at 7:00 AM.
• Realizing that your place of employment ALWAYS looks like the jaws of Hell, shrugging and doing what you damn well feel like anyway.
and finally,
• The moment when you are truly no longer a kid, because you can't be. Because you have decided that all kids, without exception, SUCK. Because now YOU have a kid, crying, yelling, wetting the bed, wanting money. Karma's a cruel bitch.
Other than that, it's the only way to be... what else ya gonna do, be a 40 year old skateboarder?
I'm glad I'm a grown-up
or
(Closed captioning for the 1337 impaired)
i r liek ben a grown-up. it's teh w00t.
or
(Closed captioning for the 1337 impaired)
i r liek ben a grown-up. it's teh w00t.
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the Grown-upmug. 1. A popular comedian among NASCAR fans, mulletheads, Pabst Blue Ribbon drinkers and rednecks (like those are different categories). Creator of the "You Might Be A Redneck" series of jokes. I say "jokes" loosely, as they're all slight derivations of the exact same joke, which isn't really a joke to begin with, just observation: rednecks lack class & intelligence. The only humor is that the rednecks themselves love this joke more than anyone. "We're backwards losers, that is SOOOO funny!"
2. Any one-trick pony such as definition 1.
2. Any one-trick pony such as definition 1.
1. "Jeff Foxworthy's on TV! Wanna watch?"
"No, I gotta clip my toenails or something..."
2. "Dat Phan won Last Comic Standing and EVERY joke was about being Korean... what a Foxworthy..."
"No, I gotta clip my toenails or something..."
2. "Dat Phan won Last Comic Standing and EVERY joke was about being Korean... what a Foxworthy..."
by Madmann October 13, 2005
Get the Jeff Foxworthymug. Karaoke Jockey. While still qualifying as a genuine knob jockey, this is the man who actually accepts money to hear "Paradise By The Dashboard Light" and "Crazy" belted out by drunk American Idol wannabes. Job requires minimal vocal talent, lame sense of humor and the ability to run electronic equipment while suffering alcohol poisoning.
by Madmann October 5, 2005
Get the KJmug. The electronic equivalent of a "paper trail". In the old days, guys like Enron and MCI had to worry about leaving hard-copy memos and such laying around that could eventually be used against them. Now it's e-mails, text files, server databases and the like.
by Madmann December 28, 2005
Get the vapor trailmug.