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Killing Kittens's definitions

philosophy

"Philosophy- A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing." --Ambrose Bierce
It was late one night when I was on a road trip with my two friends, Brian and Laura, when we decided to pull over to the side of the road and retire.

"Looks like you'll be sleeping in the car while Laura and I have the tent," Brian said.

"Here's the blanket," he continued, "You'll be fine with this, won't you?"

"Yeah," I said.

"Are you sure?"

"How is one sure of anything?"

"Or that there is any thing to be sure of," he added.

We both nodded, contemplating the profundity.
by Killing Kittens October 6, 2004
mugGet the philosophymug.

Fuckface

A person with penises for eyes. Very inconvenient, as you can imagine, but perhaps they could be of use in the porn industry.
My friend Kevin once said to me, in a fit of drunken stupidity, "Dude, I wish my eyes were penises!"

Lo and behold, the fates decided to agree with his request and grant it in the most hideous manner possible, for when he awoke the next day, instead of gazing at the ceiling above him, an inflamed phallus emerged from each eyelid.

He soon found himself standing on street corners, destitude and holding up a cardboard sign that read "Please be my friend" while civilians passed by and laughed, for he couldn't hide his erections, and when limp, his new penis-eyes looked hideous as ever. Kevin sat down and began to weep, though it was naught but urine trickling down his cheeks.

Truly, a lesson is to be learned from all this: Be careful what you wish for!
by Killing Kittens October 20, 2004
mugGet the Fuckfacemug.

kittens

"Oh my god," Brandon said as he saw my bed, "This is a major site of kitten death!"
by Killing Kittens May 18, 2004
mugGet the kittensmug.

suicide

The most sincere and socially responsible reaction to self-awareness.
You could endd it all, but you just don't have the guts.
by Killing Kittens January 17, 2005
mugGet the suicidemug.

Godzilla

A movie monster that is supposed to be some sort of radioactive dinosaur but in reality has all the qualities of a giant newt, including amphibious habits, a slow and clumsy gait, a cute face, and the ability to regenerate.

The original Godzilla film, which was originally entitled Gojira in native Japan, was a cheesy, exploitative B-grade movie with an iron-fisted and rather pedestrian attempt at social commentary. It was followed by 26 redundant and largely unimganative sequels, a terrible American remake, and countless fans who somehow think that this was a better example of the craft of movie-making and artistic siginificance than "King Kong" (1933).
Do you want to watch a truly horrifying movie that is a warning about nuclear warfare? Watch "The Day After" (1983). Godzilla is pure escapism.
by Killing Kittens July 18, 2006
mugGet the Godzillamug.

African-American

A term commonly used to refer to American blacks, who by now are no more african than any other american.
"Now they're calling us African Americans," said Bill Cosby, "We used to be black."
by Killing Kittens October 24, 2004
mugGet the African-Americanmug.

tattoo

Facial tattoos always work out REALLY well.
by Killing Kittens November 29, 2006
mugGet the tattoomug.

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