Killing Kittens's definitions

prostitute

A woman who realizes that she is only going through motions when she has sex, and might as well be getting paid.

I'm not a prostitute, I'm a pragmatist!

by Killing Kittens May 22, 2004

religion

The marraige of philosophy, metaphysics, and literature. Really, for what more could you ask?

What's your religion?

by Killing Kittens June 26, 2004

Constipation

A condition, usually mental, that prevents life's natural flow.

The constipated computer I was working on was so slow it prevented me from sending the email.

by Killing Kittens November 7, 2004

black metal

An impressive but pretentious sub-genre of heavy metal, invariably revolving around hackneyed themes of satanism and/or Nordic mythology.

The lyrics are silly, the music is majestic!

by Killing Kittens June 23, 2004

Friendship

A method of castrating men without using sharp objects.

From David DeAngelo's article:

She looked at him with compassion in her eyes
and said "Thank you... I really mean that... but
I don't want to mess up our friendship... you're
too important to me...".

by Killing Kittens March 31, 2005

dinosaur

The greatest, most diverse and successful class of land vertibrates ever, believed to have originated sometime in the Triassic about 240 million years ago, and disappearing around 65 million years ago. Gods among animals, and awesome testaments to the power of creation (or evolution, if your must insist that these words be mutually exclusive) they were physiologically superior to mammals and gave rise to birds.

Often our society shows a disinterest with the phenomena of the dinosauria, approaching paleontology with a "they're dead, who cares" attitude. They are also ridiculed for having "died out" when they in fact persisted a period of something like 160 million years--more than 40 times longer than the time elapsed since the earliest human anscestors appeared. Even the word "dinosaur" has a deprecative connotation, implying something that is outdated or obsolete.

Stop for a moment to consider that these animals did, in fact exist, and are not the chimeras of children. This writer would maintain, however, that anyone holding the view that an interest in dinosaurs is nerdy and childish deserves to have his or head bitten off by a Charcharodontosaurus.

Lots of kids my age got hooked on dinosaurs for a while--it was a childhood disease, like mumps or chicken pox, and if left alone, most kids recovered and then had a lifetime immunity to dinosaurmania. But I was that rare exception, a terminal, chronic case.-- Robert T. Bakker, "The Dinosaur Heresies"

by Killing Kittens May 18, 2004

dendrophilia

Sexual arousal derrived from trees.

Dendrophilia by Promiscuous Corndog © 2002

Written by Bobbert Mackenzie & Jay Best



Today, I humped a tree

I had to pee

No place to go but behind a tree

I saw

A hollow knothole

So I said to myself

I’ll give it a go



I humped a tree

I humped a tree

I humped a tree

Ohhhhhhhhhhh



The cops got me

They had to stop me

They threw me in jail

That’s where you come in

I need you to pay my bail



I humped a tree

I humped a tree

They threw me in jail



I humped a tree

I humped a tree

They threw me in jail



….beeb

by Killing Kittens October 7, 2004