JustAnotherGuy's definitions

Cop Karma

"Intellectual" phenomena that leads people to believe going 15 under the speed limit for 3 miles after passing a cop will either:

A) Keep said cop from giving them a ticket for flying past him, or
B) Prevent subsequent cops from coming after them because they atoned for their speeding.

Despite the fact that he was doing 80 in a 55 zone when he passed the cop, the idiot in the Corolla in front of me then decided to utilize cop karma to keep from getting a ticket. He slammed on his brakes and then proceeded to drive 42 for three miles, but it didn't work: he got bagged 18 seconds later.

by JustAnotherGuy January 15, 2014

Rhode Island Sunday

Better known as Saturday to the rest of the world, on Rhode Island Sunday all the drunks and old people come out of the woodwork to make sure those with lives can't get anywhere without at least a 45-minute commute. The methodology is comprised of several art forms, including the Rhode Island Roadblock, the Rhode Island Rubberneck, and the Flashing-Lights Brake-dance.

The scariest part of Rhode Island Sunday is that when compounded with an actual Sunday, the Rhode Island Sunday drivers and the *real* Sunday drivers are all on the road together, thus creating the greatest clusterfuck this side of Los Angeles.

"We're going to see Tom Petty at the Comcast Center, but the concert's on a Rhode Island Sunday so we have to leave an extra hour early."

by JustAnotherGuy March 8, 2010

Just-In-Case Christian

What people who don't think they need to be forgiven for anything call people who think they'll be forgiven for everything. Normally it's fun to point out hypocrisy, but when the person doing so is being a hypocrite in the process, it threatens to break the Logical Shitstorm Continuum.

"Godless people like to point out all the just-in-case Christians, yet they're no better since they don't think they require forgiveness for anything. Must be nice to always have a clear conscience because you're your own god."

by JustAnotherGuy February 3, 2010

We Need to Sit Down and Think About This

A very long, profound way of saying, "Let's have a 3-hour meeting about how to do 5 minutes' worth of work."

Bob: "Should I book the grant money at quarter end or a third each month?"

Bob's Boss: "Well that might have an effect when we try to qualify the income. If the Board can't correlate the paradigm shift correctly, they might not be able to understand how we cross-mapped the budget and the actuals. We need to sit down and think about this."

Bob: "I should've just fucking posted it."

by JustAnotherGuy February 3, 2010

Logical Shitstorm Continuum

The Logical Shitstorm Continuum basically amounts to a giant "tank" where all the stupidest, most nonsensical and illogical things that people think, say, and do are being stored by God for the day when He gets to point out what a bunch of fucking assholes the lot of us are and how lucky we are that He forgives us for it. When this "tank" finally hits full, the Apocalypse will begin, the world will end, and a whole lot of people are going to say, "Wow, not only is there a God, but He really did keep track of every stupid thing I said and did."

It also serves as a storage facility for every one of Will Ferrell's movies, though this is keeping in line with the preceding definition.

"Think twice about making that speech, Mr. President. It threatens to break the Logical Shitstorm Continuum, and you don't want that to mark the end of your presidency."

"A new Will Ferrell movie was released this weekend, and the United Nations was relived to find that the Logical Shitstorm Continuum has remained intact."

by JustAnotherGuy February 3, 2010

Rhode Island Tourism

A day's worth of activities including looking at brown rivers, old crumbling mills, a windmill they stuck on the side of the interstate, a thoroughly unimpressive skyline, a bunch of wood fires set out on the water, and wrapping it up by driving past the Big Blue Bug on the side of I-95S. Wow.

"It's hard to believe that Rhode Island Tourism is real, especially when you consider there's nothing here and most of the out-of-state plates you see are really just residents dodging the vehicle tax."

by JustAnotherGuy March 8, 2010