Definitions by Joshua B. Wright
diva
Noun:
Absolutely any woman, regardless of talent, who establishes a singing career and appears on television.
Absolutely any woman, regardless of talent, who establishes a singing career and appears on television.
"...to the contrary, Pete - over the past decade we've witnessed a veritable explosion in the population of divas, for instance. In fact, our research shows that the years between nineteen ninety and the present date saw the emergence of more divas than the previous one hundred years. Ultimately, I think that reports of the death of high culture simply don't square with the numbers."
diva by Joshua B. Wright April 7, 2004
Adjective, Abbreviation:
An abbreviation of "version 2.0," it is a naming convention most often employed ironically by programmers to denote shipping commercial software packages more accurately described by "v1" or even "beta."
An abbreviation of "version 2.0," it is a naming convention most often employed ironically by programmers to denote shipping commercial software packages more accurately described by "v1" or even "beta."
"As usual, v2 was what version 1 should've been."
"Personally, I'm going to wait for v2 - I don't enjoy beta testing."
"Personally, I'm going to wait for v2 - I don't enjoy beta testing."
v2 by Joshua B. Wright April 5, 2004
deadline
Noun, Temporal:
Designates the approximate point in time at which work begins in earnest; employee motivation is frequently observed to be "dead" before the deadline draws near.
Designates the approximate point in time at which work begins in earnest; employee motivation is frequently observed to be "dead" before the deadline draws near.
"Christ, it's the nearly deadline already?! Hey Pete, put down the controller my friend - it's time that we looked at these shuttle schematics."
deadline by Joshua B. Wright April 5, 2004
Drown Baby Moses
Expression:
In the vain of ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US, this obscure pop-culture ejaculation finds its origin in the now notorious NES platformer Bible Adventures. A quirk of the game's mechanics enabled the player, otherwise entrusted with the safe conveyance of the baby Moses across the Nile, to commit a most heinous act of infanticide by tossing the little fellow in the drink. The player would then be admonished at the conclusion of the mission that he or she had "forgotten baby Moses" - no doubt to the delight of the thousands of disgruntled children inclined to such acts of violence by being forced to play Bible Adventures instead of a real video game.
As an expression, its variety in use is exceeded only by its capacity to offend. Generally, however, "Drown Baby Moses" is employed referentially in comparisons with gaffes of a similar nature; in disputes over which video game gaffe is the worst, it is often invoked as a trump card.
In the vain of ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US, this obscure pop-culture ejaculation finds its origin in the now notorious NES platformer Bible Adventures. A quirk of the game's mechanics enabled the player, otherwise entrusted with the safe conveyance of the baby Moses across the Nile, to commit a most heinous act of infanticide by tossing the little fellow in the drink. The player would then be admonished at the conclusion of the mission that he or she had "forgotten baby Moses" - no doubt to the delight of the thousands of disgruntled children inclined to such acts of violence by being forced to play Bible Adventures instead of a real video game.
As an expression, its variety in use is exceeded only by its capacity to offend. Generally, however, "Drown Baby Moses" is employed referentially in comparisons with gaffes of a similar nature; in disputes over which video game gaffe is the worst, it is often invoked as a trump card.
Drown Baby Moses by Joshua B. Wright April 5, 2004
mental constipation
An inability to articulate one's thoughts or ideas, resulting in significant psychological distress and frustration.
Typically, this form of cognitive impaction is self-resolving. However, in cases where productive interchange with the afflicted is urgently needed, a deadline may be administered; indeed, this has proven to be one of the most effective treatments for stubborn cases of mental constipation.
Typically, this form of cognitive impaction is self-resolving. However, in cases where productive interchange with the afflicted is urgently needed, a deadline may be administered; indeed, this has proven to be one of the most effective treatments for stubborn cases of mental constipation.
Mark: "So, you know, it's like... uh, er... damn, you know, that, uh... thing!"
Dave: "Yeesh. It's too bad that they don't make a laxative for mental constipation!"
Dave: "Yeesh. It's too bad that they don't make a laxative for mental constipation!"
mental constipation by Joshua B. Wright April 5, 2004
Word of the Day on December 5, 2007
cognitive impaction
Noun:
Any of a number of conditions characterized by the involuntary suspension of mental processes crucial to self-expression and/or higher reasoning.
Cases of cognitive impaction can frequently be identified by inarticulate attempts at discourse, extended guttural utterances, slack-jaws and bugged out eyes on the part of the afflicted. Treatments are highly specific to each variety of cognitive impaction and range from a slap "upside" the head to a deadline in the most severe cases.
Also see mental constipation.
Any of a number of conditions characterized by the involuntary suspension of mental processes crucial to self-expression and/or higher reasoning.
Cases of cognitive impaction can frequently be identified by inarticulate attempts at discourse, extended guttural utterances, slack-jaws and bugged out eyes on the part of the afflicted. Treatments are highly specific to each variety of cognitive impaction and range from a slap "upside" the head to a deadline in the most severe cases.
Also see mental constipation.
"Overwhelmed at the prospect of having the bounty of an entire doughnut shop all to himself, Homer immediately suffered a massive cognitive impaction that reduced him to little more than a drooling mass of manflesh."
cognitive impaction by Joshua B. Wright April 5, 2004
Color Dreams
Noun:
Best known for its exploits as a rogue NES developer, Color Dreams was the only third party software company to produce unlicensed NES carts without being successfully sued. By employing an embarrassingly simple hack, Color Dreams engineers were able to create game carts that bypassed the NES's authentication circuitry without violating Nintendo's intellectual property.
This isn't to say that Color Dreams was a success, mind you; aside from its creative hacking practices, Color Dreams is probably most famous as the development house that gave birth to the notorious Bible Adventures - a gaudy slog through Old Testament cliches notable only for what may well be the biggest gaffe in the history of gaming.
Amazingly enough, Color Dreams dwindles on under its subsidiary, "Wisdom Tree Software." Indeed, game collectors and those of morbid curiosity should take note that as of this writing, it was even possible to order Color Dreams titles through a 1-800 number. A bit of googling should reveal the specifics - contact information has been withheld here in the interests of the innocent.
Best known for its exploits as a rogue NES developer, Color Dreams was the only third party software company to produce unlicensed NES carts without being successfully sued. By employing an embarrassingly simple hack, Color Dreams engineers were able to create game carts that bypassed the NES's authentication circuitry without violating Nintendo's intellectual property.
This isn't to say that Color Dreams was a success, mind you; aside from its creative hacking practices, Color Dreams is probably most famous as the development house that gave birth to the notorious Bible Adventures - a gaudy slog through Old Testament cliches notable only for what may well be the biggest gaffe in the history of gaming.
Amazingly enough, Color Dreams dwindles on under its subsidiary, "Wisdom Tree Software." Indeed, game collectors and those of morbid curiosity should take note that as of this writing, it was even possible to order Color Dreams titles through a 1-800 number. A bit of googling should reveal the specifics - contact information has been withheld here in the interests of the innocent.
Color Dreams by Joshua B. Wright April 4, 2004