Definitions by Jeffrey Douglas

daft bint 

Naive female, often perceived as stupid. One who would buy Chantelle's biography and label it a "good read".

Sarah: "That iraq place must be really hot!"
Dave: "Why so?"
Sarah: "Well, look at these pictures! It is so hot there these cars just catch on fire!"
Dave: "You daft bint. Iron my shirt, wench!"

daft bint by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006

blustery 

Windy. So windy in fact, that many hazards arise in 'blustery' conditions. Such hazards include windswept appearances, missing pieces of clothes from the washing lines and cold ears.
Used solely in the north so hardened grizzly northerners can talk about their constant struggle against the evils of blustery days.

A day in the north was very windy,.....
John: "By heck, it in't half blustery out there'
Harry: "Aye, blowin' a bastardin' gale"

blustery by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006

nimble 

adj. meaning agile. Nimble people are often thin and frail. Piano players are nimble, weak and frail. They would be no longer nimble if their fingers were cut off, so perhaps being nimble isnt all its cracked up to be

E.g. Jason Robinson

Frank: "Woe, woo, oh, the way he prances along is so nimble! so gracious! so elegant"
Baz: "But he is weak and frail. What good is there in being nimble, when you can't lift a car??"

nimble by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006

wonky bollocks 

pro-noun used as insult to anybody showing poor co-ordination

Henry: "Oh adam you've dropped that frisbee again you f*****g wonky bollock bastard"
Adam: "i really am a wonky bollocks minge"

wonky bollocks by Jeffrey Douglas September 13, 2006

Gay as a Dutch Window 

To be very very gay, homosexual or shirtlifting. to define somebody as gay as a dutch window, the recipient of such horrific abuse, must have done something very poorly, acted in a queer fashion or displayed his effeminate side to a large degree.

Tipex is Gay as a Dutch Window as it smells and comes....in small bottles

Gay as a Dutch Window by Jeffrey Douglas September 10, 2006

empirical Formula 

empirical Formula is a hip hop chemistry term used by the real bad boys of chemistry. It is a formula that shows the simplest ratio of the compound or formula in question. empirical Formula has been used by such bad boys such as Alec Baldwin and jane Seymour-Butts to strip down a formula better than slim fast.

Miss Kelvin: "The empirical formula is very important to chemistry, life and your happiness."
Jennings: "Yes miss, indeed one needs the empirical formula to just last a day in the ghetto"

empirical Formula by Jeffrey Douglas September 8, 2006

Mole 

A) a scientific term used to describe the amount of substance in grams, which has the same number of particles as there are in 12g of carbon 12. One mole of a substance contains 6.023x10`23 particles. This is obviously rad as it shows how tiny atoms and particles really are. They are smaller than bridget the midget and also smaller than the public's estimation of Jeremy Clarkson.

B) a small furry creature who is proficient at destroying peoples gardens and being short sighted.

Jenkins: "I love the whole idea of a mole. How incredible!"
Peter: "How so?"
Jenkins: "Just think, it makes a boy of 4ft9" look HUGE"

Mole #1: "I'm a mole"
Farmer: "Should have gone to specsavers"

Mole by Jeffrey Douglas September 8, 2006