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Jeffrey Douglas's definitions

Anti-clockwise

The way of left handed people. The opposite direction to how the little ticky things go on your spiderman themed wristwatch.

Many things go anti-clockwise, however to list them would make the world implode.
Craig: "That girl was seriously hot! It's a shame that she walks around that lamp post in an anti-clockwise fashion."

David: "To be fair.. she is left handed."

Craig: "Urgh..."
by Jeffrey Douglas February 10, 2007
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tip-off

A tip off is a handy piece of information given by one to another. Tip-offs have been used in history (see the examples).
Regular tip-off;
"Look out Bill, he's a Queer."

Historical tip-off;
"Look, here, Hitler has said Peace in our time!"
"Nah, bollocks nev, he's a Queer."
by Jeffrey Douglas November 23, 2006
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window of opportunity

A time where the chance for action (usually, but not always, sexual in nature) arises. When one sees such a chance, one must grab it (or, if you will, jump through the window of opportunity).
1. The Sexual Window of Opportunity. . .
Where one comes across a girl drinking a pint, and casually slips her a tab of rohypnol, thus creating a window of opportunity for easy sex later.

2. The non-Sexual Window of Opportunity. . .
Where one sees and old lady struggling with heavy shopping, the window of opportunity arises to help her. Remove a baguette, whack her over the head, and take her purse and sausages.
by Jeffrey Douglas February 1, 2007
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Do a dad

Doing a dad is an act that is hilarious to those all around you but their laughter only drives you into the downward spiral known as doing a dad. Doing a dad shoots your emotive side into overdrive warp speed. It can start off small, but the tears keep coming until all that is left of someone doing a dad is a blithering mound of tears sniffles and soiled handkerchiefs. All it takes is a few jokes at the person's expense like prodding their man-breasts and saying "Gor blimey, they're like titties them, tubbs", then the water works come on much to the amusement of the audience.

The phrase comes from a real person, with real emotional displays, who regulary did a dad. Do a dad is now a common phrase all over the world, usually preceeded by don't.
Chris: "Waddle waddle! Ha! Bill, you walk like a penguin!"
Bill: "MMnnn. Boo hoo! <cry cry cry>"
Tom: "Oh god, don't cry about it!"
Chris: "Oh! C'mon don't do a dad."
by Jeffrey Douglas September 3, 2006
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miss of the season

1. term used by commentators to describe a footballers sometimes hilarious miss.

2. term used by friends to mock a male who has failed to shag the town bike
John Motson: "Rooney, Giggs and Ronaldo, now surely, Ye - Oh - no! miss of the season. Piss poor shot from Ronaldo

Kev: "As if you didn't bang Sally, she is soo easy!"
Gav: "Yea but i forgot my rhohypnol"
Kev: "Oh, mate, miss of the season!"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 19, 2006
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12

Without any doubt what so ever, 12 is the greatest number of all time. it's not likely that anyone does'nt know this but for those of you who want to be reminded of just how good 12 is here... Months in a Year? Hours in a.m? some of the finest rugby players have worn 12, the number of the inside centre jersey in union. The board of friends officialy recognized this, and one of it's main aims is to spread the knowledge of this fact. In the history of the universe,only 12 things have happened, numer 3 being dinosaurs and number 11 being star wars. this isn't a crackpot theory, throughout any given day you will see at least three 12 references. Snoop Dogg's favourite number is also 12.
"everyone knows 12 is great. even dead people still appreciate the 12th of the month"
by Jeffrey Douglas August 6, 2006
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slave ship

Comparison to be used when describing a tightly packed area, or mode of transport. Comes from when the slave trade was in full swing, and P&O ferries dropped their standards to optimise profit margins.
Harry: "Joshua! This train is bloody packed! It's worse than a bleeding slave ship!"
Josh: "Yea, i know. Smell's 'n' all!"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 20, 2006
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