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Jeffrey Douglas's definitions

Dinoman

Dinoman was actually a real dinosaur, apparantly not dissimilar to a Velociraptor. Dinoman comes about, as the Stenonychosaurus waws believed to be evolving into a humanoid figure. As one can imagine, it causes great hilarity to hear dinoman's catchphrases, such as "Chamoon, bruvas, i be a jurassic jimmy" or "i be one prehistoric mofo, hee hee"
"Dinoman has an intelligance rating of 10"
"Dino man, he be a superhero mutha fucker"
by Jeffrey Douglas July 27, 2006
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empirical Formula

empirical Formula is a hip hop chemistry term used by the real bad boys of chemistry. It is a formula that shows the simplest ratio of the compound or formula in question. empirical Formula has been used by such bad boys such as Alec Baldwin and jane Seymour-Butts to strip down a formula better than slim fast.
Miss Kelvin: "The empirical formula is very important to chemistry, life and your happiness."
Jennings: "Yes miss, indeed one needs the empirical formula to just last a day in the ghetto"
by Jeffrey Douglas September 8, 2006
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nimble

adj. meaning agile. Nimble people are often thin and frail. Piano players are nimble, weak and frail. They would be no longer nimble if their fingers were cut off, so perhaps being nimble isnt all its cracked up to be
E.g. Jason Robinson

Frank: "Woe, woo, oh, the way he prances along is so nimble! so gracious! so elegant"
Baz: "But he is weak and frail. What good is there in being nimble, when you can't lift a car??"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006
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lads night

An event strictly involving only males. Activities on a lads night out include; drinking (alcohol), gambling, the muffin game and many many more.

The lads night had its origins (like fireworks) in the middle east, where Ghengis Khan would ride with his clan to a neighbouring tribe and destroy them. This version of a lads night did not catch on in europe.

The breakthrough in europe for the lads night came with Schiller (Goethe's best friend) in the 18th Century. He called it the gentleman's petit renaissance. These nights generally involved silhouette making and shirades.

At around the same time in the emerging states of america, the english were enjoying lads nights. The americans did not appreciate these evenings of drunken revelry, and declared war. This ended (temporarily) the lads night in the Americas.

Centuries later, the weight of being without a lads night society took its toll. America's economy crashed and the country went into a depression sending shockwaves throughout the world. President Hoover saw the mistake and called upon a lads night revival, giving tax breaks to those who threw the best poker nights and owned the best laser challenge sets.

In the present day, the lads night out has lost it's way slightly. It is no longer the driving political power it once was. Taken over by the proles and the masses it has fallen into disrepute. More and more lads nights end in injury and arrests.

The future of the lads night is then unclear. Perhaps it will undergo a resurgance in popularity, but it faces stiff competition from chick flicks and aids.
Typical 'lads night' venues

The house. (for poor folk)
The dog track. (for rich folk)
The country retreat. (for cottagers)

Stock phrases for a lads night (and some to avoid!)

DO SAY : - -
"MORE BEER!"
"Women are pure evil."
"That Mel Gibson really gets on my titties"

DO NOT SAY!: - -
"Oh no, i'm driving"
"Can't we just see our girlfriend/wife/sibling?& quot;
"Look guys, i brought legally blonde! "

A Lads night is just what i need
by Jeffrey Douglas February 3, 2007
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burden

Noun. Something that weighs you down. Usually a worry or a sore point you don't share with close friends or orangutangs.

You can also be a burden on someone else when you try and talk about your problems and worries to someone else.
Physical Hang ups, girlfriends, wife (wives) or debt. all of these are burdens.

Hayley: "I'm worried!"
Steve: "Shut up you have so many burdens! Don't become a burden yourself!"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 15, 2006
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Unicycle Wheelchair

Arguably one of the better NASA fields of expertise. When the space race was on and it was Uncle Sam vs U.S.S.R, Astronaut vs Cosmonaut and Cats vs Dogs, the need for unicycle wheelchairs became apparant, and Mr. Nasa was once quoted saying, after they had been developed, "i don't know how we ever got by without them"

The Unicycle wheelchair was brought into the commercial sector at the very second the bee gees popularised close harmonic singing in tight trousers. Although, like toasters, expensive at first, the next christmas every household had one. The ratio in Belgium at the time of Michael Moore's conception was 12 unicycle wheelchairs to every 5 people with cheshire cats.

Through these developing years, people began to tamper with NASA's creation. Gentleman would "PIMP" or "ICE" their "RIDES" by adding "HARDCORE" propulsion systems and a "SICK" paint job. Ladies were not so intent on being the flyest mutha so were content with fluffy dice and a sombrero.

Today they are popular still, especially around buckingham palace.
"Unicycle Wheelchairs are essential for respiration"

"Is it a bird?"
"Is it a plane?"
"No, by Jove, its a unicycle wheelchair"
by Jeffrey Douglas August 12, 2006
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Mole

A) a scientific term used to describe the amount of substance in grams, which has the same number of particles as there are in 12g of carbon 12. One mole of a substance contains 6.023x10`23 particles. This is obviously rad as it shows how tiny atoms and particles really are. They are smaller than bridget the midget and also smaller than the public's estimation of Jeremy Clarkson.

B) a small furry creature who is proficient at destroying peoples gardens and being short sighted.
Jenkins: "I love the whole idea of a mole. How incredible!"
Peter: "How so?"
Jenkins: "Just think, it makes a boy of 4ft9" look HUGE"

Mole #1: "I'm a mole"
Farmer: "Should have gone to specsavers"
by Jeffrey Douglas September 8, 2006
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