JaneGordon.com's definitions

Re-opening Anxiety

The anxiety of post COVID-19 opening of everything without social distancing or sanitary precautions.
Also know as re-entry anxiety.

The thought of going back to our old filthy, pre-COVID-19 habits is giving me re-opening anxiety. Puleeeaaasseee let's at least not go back to the unsanitary, nasty habit of shaking hands!

by JaneGordon.com May 8, 2021

Ass Whole

When such crap is spoken that the only polite response is to hand the speaker toilet paper.

When I watch and listen to the Republican Debates, it is one giant ASS WHOLE where such crap comes out of their mouths that the only polite response is to send toilet paper.

by JaneGordon.com January 24, 2016

X-Sex

Having sex with your X after you broke up.

Eric and Jane were off-and-on for six years but finally broke up when Jane got engaged and moved to Rome, and Eric married his college girlfriend. They are still friends decades later, but when Eric wanted to get Jane back into bed, she just explained "Sorry, I don't do X-sex."

by JaneGordon.com March 19, 2023

Dancing-Lips

When you're trying to kiss, but your favorite dance song is playing and your lips keep time with the music.

John and Jane were in the middle of very romantic kissing, when Jane's favorite dance song started playing. John didn't know what was happening when Jane got dancing-lips, and couldn't help kissing in time to the music.

by JaneGordon.com April 14, 2024

John-Jerk

When someone is just being irrationally stubborn for no reason, but they are still adorably lovable.

John was being a John-jerk and insisting he was right (he wasn't), but I just love him too much to take the bait and fight, so I am happy to be the blame-eater.

by JaneGordon.com April 4, 2023

premature redecoration

Premature Redecoration: Putting up holiday decorations WAY too early.

The day after Halloween as she was taking down {holiday decorations of ghosts and pumpkins, she put up her Christmas decorations. It's only November first and this is the worst case of premature redecoration I have seen- she skipped right over Thanksgiving!

by JaneGordon.com January 1, 2016

Mask-Matching

Staying chic and fashionable by matching your jewelry and outfits to your face-mask every day.

OMG I just can't have my outfit clash with my mask! Jane's interchangeable jewelry makes mask-matching so much easier and affordable.

by JaneGordon.com May 10, 2020