Jamie Douglas's definitions

pannces

Alternate spelling of the word pants amongst the literati.

C'mon Jeeves, let's go down the public lavatories and writes cursewords on the wall like "pannces"

by Jamie Douglas December 7, 2006

military golf

Means you're going: Left, Right, Left, Right, Left, Right ...

Another excellent golfing put down.

"Into the trees again boyo, I didn't realise we were playing military golf"

by Jamie Douglas September 8, 2006

rubbish head

The most offensive insult in the world.

Especially if you are four.

It should be the insult of choice for the parents of small children, so as to protect their delicate ears.

"That winger missed a sitter, what a rubbish head"

by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006

weather

Weather is the thing that makes blighty so unbearable. In blighty weather is terrible all the time, so much so that many people choose to move abroad or simply jump into the ocean and try to swim to another country. The general weather pattern acorss the United Kingdom is rain, rain, rain. Then a cold front. Then rain, rain, rain. Then freezing winds and snow. Then rain, rain, rain. The Roman Emperor Caeser once abandoned his quest to rule Britain because of the weather, and during the second world war the Luftwaffe were defeated in the Battle of Britain because the steel that made their aeroplanes rusted within minutes of coming into contact with British weather.

Tim: "How's the weather?"
Jerry: "You know, sunny!"

by Jamie Douglas September 1, 2006

mighty fine

adj. A good way to describe quiche.

It is also good to describe other pleasurable things this way.

A: 'How's the quiche?'
B: 'That's mighty fine quiche'

Tom had had himself such a mighty fine bit of pie he eagerly awaited second helpings.

by Jamie Douglas November 16, 2006

Peter Crouch

Without doubt, the finest footballer taller than eight feet in the universe. With an uncanny knack for unravelling his telescopic legs Peter Crouch was able to dominate world football for a generation, winning the FA Cup in 2006, the English League in 2008, the world cup in 2010 and becoming president of the Galaxy a short time later. Peter Crouch is a hero of our time.

Let's gan down t'kop and cheer Peter Crouch

by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006

beer farts

Beer farts are the product of drinking too much beer, especially but not exclusively bitter.

They are incredibly smelly and frequent, and make your bum itch.

Beer farts are the worst thing to develop on a date, unless you feel comfortable blaming noxious odours on your partner.

John: "Bloody hell Jim, after those bitters last night I've been farting all morning!"
Jim: "Me too - the beer farts are coming thick and fast!"

What's that smell? Beer farts.

Man: "It's so good of you to agree to go out with me."
{Cue uncontrollable beer farts}
Woman: "Was that you?"
Man: "No you smelly ogre, it was you!"

by Jamie Douglas January 20, 2007