Jamie Douglas's definitions

sister shot

Golfing term. Means "it's up there, but you're not proud".

When one hits a total duffer, but it trickles along the ground and onto the green, one has hit a sister shot.

"Wow, that sister shot has set you up for par!"

by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006

battery powered

Something that can give immense pleasure until the batteries are dead.

Women should never insert something battery powered into their bearded clam in case the battery leaks and burns them, but this doesn't stop Britians ever growing Rampant Rabbit using population.

Radio controlled cars, ipods, remote controls and vibrators are all battery powered.

by Jamie Douglas December 7, 2006

saw that coming like a fat man round the corner

Blatently obvious. If a fat person tries to sneak round a corner they will be seen, as their belly will protrude first and give them away. Hence if something can be seen a mile off, or is really obvious, it can be 'seen coming like a fat man round the corner'

Phil: 'Hey, did you hear Janice was fired?'
Butch: 'Yeah, I saw that coming like a fat man round the corner!"

by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006

weathergirl

The yummiest of all the Z-list celebrities. To be a weathergirl you must be either blonde or brunette or redhed, and you must be very pretty and have a great body. If you wish to be a weathergirl, being swedish is of benefit but not a requirement. Famous weathergirls include Ulrika Johnson and bald-headed-moustache-man Michael Fish. If you see a weathergirl, steer clear of them as they will have an IQ of roughly 3, and this may cause them to spontaneously combust.

Kevin: "Who's that nobody?"
Phil: "Just some weathergirl."
Kevin: "Hmm, hottie."

by Jamie Douglas September 1, 2006

weather

Weather is the thing that makes blighty so unbearable. In blighty weather is terrible all the time, so much so that many people choose to move abroad or simply jump into the ocean and try to swim to another country. The general weather pattern acorss the United Kingdom is rain, rain, rain. Then a cold front. Then rain, rain, rain. Then freezing winds and snow. Then rain, rain, rain. The Roman Emperor Caeser once abandoned his quest to rule Britain because of the weather, and during the second world war the Luftwaffe were defeated in the Battle of Britain because the steel that made their aeroplanes rusted within minutes of coming into contact with British weather.

Tim: "How's the weather?"
Jerry: "You know, sunny!"

by Jamie Douglas September 1, 2006

Peter Crouch

Without doubt, the finest footballer taller than eight feet in the universe. With an uncanny knack for unravelling his telescopic legs Peter Crouch was able to dominate world football for a generation, winning the FA Cup in 2006, the English League in 2008, the world cup in 2010 and becoming president of the Galaxy a short time later. Peter Crouch is a hero of our time.

Let's gan down t'kop and cheer Peter Crouch

by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006

beer farts

Beer farts are the product of drinking too much beer, especially but not exclusively bitter.

They are incredibly smelly and frequent, and make your bum itch.

Beer farts are the worst thing to develop on a date, unless you feel comfortable blaming noxious odours on your partner.

John: "Bloody hell Jim, after those bitters last night I've been farting all morning!"
Jim: "Me too - the beer farts are coming thick and fast!"

What's that smell? Beer farts.

Man: "It's so good of you to agree to go out with me."
{Cue uncontrollable beer farts}
Woman: "Was that you?"
Man: "No you smelly ogre, it was you!"

by Jamie Douglas January 20, 2007