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Jamie Douglas's definitions

mesoscale

Between the macroscopic and microscopic scale.
If planets are macroscopic and atoms microscopic, humans can be described as a mesoscale.

1m is a mesoscale compared to an inch and a mile.
by Jamie Douglas December 14, 2006
mugGet the mesoscalemug.

supermarket legs

n. Slapper

"Cheap and always open".
Jack: "Hey Bill, have you seen the new girl Sharon?"
Bill: "Yeah Jack, but I hear she's got real supermarket legs!"
by Jamie Douglas September 30, 2006
mugGet the supermarket legsmug.

first mate

The second in command on a ship (I know).

The person most likely to stab the captain in the back, which is ironic as he should be his closest confidant.
Captain Barbosa was second in command as first mate of the Black Pearl before stabbing his captain Jack Sparrow in the back and taking the ship for his own.
by Jamie Douglas December 6, 2006
mugGet the first matemug.

full frontal lobotomy

A full frontal lobotomy is a form of psychosurgery. It consists of cutting the connections to and from, or simply destroying, the prefrontal cortex. This brain region has been implicated in planning complex cognitive behaviours, personality expression and moderating correct social behavior.

These procedures often result in major personality changes. Lobotomies have been used in the past to treat a wide range of mental illnesses including schizophrenia, clinical depression, and various anxiety disorders.

Celebrities who have had this procedure include Jack Nicholson in One Flew Over the Cuckoo Nest, golfer Jack Nicklaus, Prince William and President George W Bush.

The distinguishing mark of someone who has had a full frontal lobotomy is a nice pair of scars around the temples. The survival rate of the operation was vastly increased after the discovery of the lead pipe, which could be used to knock patients unconscious before the operation and meant surgery was no longer performed on people who were awake.

The full frontal lobotomy has long been criticized by the medical profession, as many are repulsed at the idea of destroying healthy tissue. The procedure while seemingly barbaric has been found particularly effective in controlling politicians.

Tesco began offering full frontal lobotomies with a four pack of tinned spaghetti in 1999.
"Let's go to the supermarket for some pasta and a full frontal lobotomy."

Patient: "Doctor I received this injury while drinking last night."
Doctor: "That seems to be an unidentified drinking injury. The only known cure is a full frontal lobotomy."

Jimmy's Mum: "Jimmy, you've hardly said a word since your lobotomy."
Jimmy: "Mhhwuahhg."
by Jamie Douglas November 23, 2006
mugGet the full frontal lobotomymug.

Peter Crouch

Without doubt, the finest footballer taller than eight feet in the universe. With an uncanny knack for unravelling his telescopic legs Peter Crouch was able to dominate world football for a generation, winning the FA Cup in 2006, the English League in 2008, the world cup in 2010 and becoming president of the Galaxy a short time later. Peter Crouch is a hero of our time.
Let's gan down t'kop and cheer Peter Crouch
by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006
mugGet the Peter Crouchmug.

beer farts

Beer farts are the product of drinking too much beer, especially but not exclusively bitter.

They are incredibly smelly and frequent, and make your bum itch.

Beer farts are the worst thing to develop on a date, unless you feel comfortable blaming noxious odours on your partner.
John: "Bloody hell Jim, after those bitters last night I've been farting all morning!"
Jim: "Me too - the beer farts are coming thick and fast!"

What's that smell? Beer farts.

Man: "It's so good of you to agree to go out with me."
{Cue uncontrollable beer farts}
Woman: "Was that you?"
Man: "No you smelly ogre, it was you!"
by Jamie Douglas January 20, 2007
mugGet the beer fartsmug.

mighty fine

adj. A good way to describe quiche.

It is also good to describe other pleasurable things this way.
A: 'How's the quiche?'
B: 'That's mighty fine quiche'

Tom had had himself such a mighty fine bit of pie he eagerly awaited second helpings.
by Jamie Douglas November 16, 2006
mugGet the mighty finemug.

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