1 definition by Ihateyourichard

Richie

Richie, is your average white alpha male who thinks his shit doesn't stink. He leads you on and makes you feel like you're the greatest person he's ever met and like you are the one he wants to be with for the rest of his life. He waits for you to spill your heart out, then disappears like motherfucking Houdini. Where's he go? Simple, he goes on a dick sucking caravan with a bunch of hyenas and accidently loses his phone along the way. Probably in his ass when he was fisting himself. A year passes before Richie finally gets back from the caravan and comes across another phone. He texts you explaining himself, of course leaving out the part about the hyenas and all the loads he took to the face, and he sweeps you off your feet again. He tells you how sorry he is and how much he missed you and that he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. Since you're such a sweet girl, you give him another chance. He will talk to you for a month until he loses his phone, for the 47th time this year, and breaks your recently healed heart again. You will then find him on Facebook and see that he has actually moved onto another broad and started a mini family with her. It will tear you up inside, but deep down you know he isn't worth shit. Steer clear of Richies. They are arrogant, shitholes that get off on your sadness and bring nothing but pain to your life. Never give Richies another chance. Let them know what piles of shit they are and that you deserve nothing but the best.

1. Hey what is that thing out there blowing that hyena? Oh, it's just a Richie.

2. What rhymes with "Ihaveagapingassholeandsometimesgetbitchie"? Richie.

3. Hey y'all, my name is Richie and I love when The Incredible Hulk fists my tiny little asshole!

4. Gee, look at this steamy pile of shit in my yard. It must be a Richie.

by Ihateyourichard October 30, 2013