8 definitions by I'm A Fucking Unicorn
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn June 15, 2016
Sexually arousing literature; here's some below written by myself for Wattpad a year ago
First, I’m going to tease you. I’m going to taunt you as I see fit, making you thirst for my naked body more and more with every passing second. I’m going to smile like the naughty coquette I am, lick my lips, and look into your eyes in a way that screams, “Fuck me! Now!”
But I’m going to make you wait.
I’m going to let you get rock hard as you stare at me, imagining all the things you want to do to me in bed. I’m going to let you fantasize about tearing off my clothes and nibbling on my flesh and licking my nipples and fondling my breasts and fucking me in all your favorite positions.
But I’m going to make you wonder, just a little, whether or not you’ll actually get laid.
Only once you’ve reached the pinnacle of horniness, I’m going to grab your crotch and massage your cock through your pants. Then I’m going to slip my hand behind your waistline and jerk you off before whispering, “Take me to bed.” With one fluid swoop of my arms, then, I’m going to strip off my dress, revealing the fact that I’m not wearing panties.
But I’m not going to help you undress.
As you clamber about, trying to kick off your trousers and unbutton your shirt, I’m going to stand there, fingering myself, and let you gawk at my curves, aching to smack my ass and finger my pussy and bury your face in my perfect tits. Then I’m going to push you onto the bed, forcing you to recline.
First, I’m going to tease you. I’m going to taunt you as I see fit, making you thirst for my naked body more and more with every passing second. I’m going to smile like the naughty coquette I am, lick my lips, and look into your eyes in a way that screams, “Fuck me! Now!”
But I’m going to make you wait.
I’m going to let you get rock hard as you stare at me, imagining all the things you want to do to me in bed. I’m going to let you fantasize about tearing off my clothes and nibbling on my flesh and licking my nipples and fondling my breasts and fucking me in all your favorite positions.
But I’m going to make you wonder, just a little, whether or not you’ll actually get laid.
Only once you’ve reached the pinnacle of horniness, I’m going to grab your crotch and massage your cock through your pants. Then I’m going to slip my hand behind your waistline and jerk you off before whispering, “Take me to bed.” With one fluid swoop of my arms, then, I’m going to strip off my dress, revealing the fact that I’m not wearing panties.
But I’m not going to help you undress.
As you clamber about, trying to kick off your trousers and unbutton your shirt, I’m going to stand there, fingering myself, and let you gawk at my curves, aching to smack my ass and finger my pussy and bury your face in my perfect tits. Then I’m going to push you onto the bed, forcing you to recline.
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn October 11, 2016
Sexually arousing literature
An exert from a Wattpad story a wrote a year ago
As you lie there, growing more and more eager to stick it inside me, I’m going to mouth your cock with everything I’ve got—licking the shaft from base to tip and then pursing my lips and bopping my head up and down, salivating as much as possible so you’re all lubed up.
But I not going to mount you—not yet.
I’m going to suck and suck, pausing once in awhile to tell you how wet my pussy’s getting. And when you moan in gratitude, I’m going to stop and smile in a way that lets you know I’m having the time of my life blowing you.
Only once that massive cock of yours is properly moistened—by my standards, not yours—I’m going to climb on top of it. “I need you inside me! Now!” I’m going to say as you penetrate me, finally.
But I’m not going to let you hold the reins.
I’m going to grab my own tits and bounce up and down—slowly at first, then faster, welcoming your dick deeper and deeper inside me. I’m going to scream, “Fuck me! Like that!” louder and louder. Again and again.
Then I’m going to pause, suddenly, to look your in the eyes as I squeeze my pussy muscles tight. You’ll put your arms around me and pull me down so my breasts are jiggling right in your face and you can suckle my nipples. Without warning, you’ll grab my ass and flip me over to take me from behind.
An exert from a Wattpad story a wrote a year ago
As you lie there, growing more and more eager to stick it inside me, I’m going to mouth your cock with everything I’ve got—licking the shaft from base to tip and then pursing my lips and bopping my head up and down, salivating as much as possible so you’re all lubed up.
But I not going to mount you—not yet.
I’m going to suck and suck, pausing once in awhile to tell you how wet my pussy’s getting. And when you moan in gratitude, I’m going to stop and smile in a way that lets you know I’m having the time of my life blowing you.
Only once that massive cock of yours is properly moistened—by my standards, not yours—I’m going to climb on top of it. “I need you inside me! Now!” I’m going to say as you penetrate me, finally.
But I’m not going to let you hold the reins.
I’m going to grab my own tits and bounce up and down—slowly at first, then faster, welcoming your dick deeper and deeper inside me. I’m going to scream, “Fuck me! Like that!” louder and louder. Again and again.
Then I’m going to pause, suddenly, to look your in the eyes as I squeeze my pussy muscles tight. You’ll put your arms around me and pull me down so my breasts are jiggling right in your face and you can suckle my nipples. Without warning, you’ll grab my ass and flip me over to take me from behind.
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn October 11, 2016
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn June 15, 2016
When a woman usually in high school or college is horny wants to be fucked by multiple men until she cums
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn September 27, 2016
This word is used when 11 year olds think they're cool by doing cocaine when in reality, they can't even spell it
Person 1: Shampain, cokecane, gasalean. And most things in between.
Person 2: fucking hell man where did you learn to spell
Person 2: fucking hell man where did you learn to spell
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn June 15, 2016
When you are looking through definitions people have wrote for the Urban Dictionary and you see one so terribly disgusting you have to click the Keep Out button 180,000 times
If I had a dollar for everytime I just clicked the Keep Out button I could raise a child. Who the actual fuck writes these Urban Dictionary definitions?!
by I'm A Fucking Unicorn June 15, 2016