Hedley Clubnobber's definitions

fundamentalist

Mental certainty. Fun at the start, never at the end. Someone who brings fireworks to Armageddon.

a. 'that's fundamentalist nonesense?!'

b. 'in the name of the Prince of Peace, die you doubter!'

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

EU

European Union; an organised hypocrisy of rapacious corporations, aristocrats and neo-catholics shepherding the mindless flock into Orwell's 1984. Modelled on plans set in place by one A. Hitler (popular Viennese painter and bon viveur; mid 20thC) then continued by every other Euro-demagogue since. Emblem on the EU Paliament, Goddess Europa riding a 10 headed beast. Nuff said! :(

EU taking you to Armageddon with style.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

idea

Something which, if considered good, cannot ever be used in a democratic society, the plural of which can only be prevented by joining any major political party. Something which a 'chav' never gets but a human may have when staring down to the bottom of an empty beer glass.

a. 'That's a good idea, Prime Minister'.

b. 'You swine!'.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

Oldham

Words will have to do....'Grim Up North' could've been written for this collection of stones. Nice on the outskirts but otherwise a sunami of chavness and thus a cultural wastland. It could indeed be the quintessential 'classless society' due to an extraordinary lack of style. Everything that socialism was meant to be! 'God-forsaken' would suggest the Almighty actually had been there once and so deliberately left it, which most authorities seriously doubt. A mix of Yorkshire rejects, Manchester overspill-uber-scum and the North Asian sub-continent. Market day reminding one strongly of the Orc army battle scenes in 'Lord of the Ringroads'.

Q. How do you know a girl from Oldham is having an orgasm?

A. She drops her chips.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 1, 2006

politician

Trickster, highwayman, mugger, pick-pocket, sexually confused, conscience-free zone; possibly male or female, but likely to be lying about about it either way. intellectually stupid but with acute animal cunning. Knows only money thus major coporate-parties are able to slit the throats of generations yet to come without concern. In Britain politicians are not so much 'elected' as 'selected'. Often associated with child molestation, prostitution, murder, swindling, refuse, robbery, violence and fund raising bingo nights, when they put on a venere of humanity. As false as the shine on Satan's wings.

Labour, Conservative & Liberal - Britian's political Unholy Trinity.

Trustworthy politician = a contradiction in terms

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006

yorkshire man

oh dear! yorkshire (english county) provides many a salutory tale in how not to behave when away from home. men of that large county tend to be extremely boastful on account of their lack of size in other areas. borish, arrogant, self-opinionated, unforgiving. have a pathological dislike of lancastrians on account of having had their arses thrashed several hundred years ago by said county. treated sympathetically when in lancashire to seek cultural enlightenment. cannot pronounce the word 'cricket'. women of that county provide regular, if 'sameish' entertainment, to lancastrian men living close to the border.

a. I'm a yorkshire man!

b. Then you should leave!

by Hedley Clubnobber September 17, 2006

manci

pronouncewd 'man-key': dirty, filthy, grubby, grimey; derived from a person living in Manchester, UK, known to all surrounding towns as 'Mancs', and associated with the industrial revolution when everyone and everything was a stranger to soap.

a) oh, look at her/him! S/he's manci!

b) indeed, s/he does comes from south Lancashire.

by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006