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Hedley Clubnobber's definitions

baghead

Term with which to affectionately chide one whose head, like a woman's handbag, contains everything and nothing all at the same time.
a. 'What are you up to now you baghead?'

b. 'I want a divorce'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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yorkshire man

oh dear! yorkshire (english county) provides many a salutory tale in how not to behave when away from home. men of that large county tend to be extremely boastful on account of their lack of size in other areas. borish, arrogant, self-opinionated, unforgiving. have a pathological dislike of lancastrians on account of having had their arses thrashed several hundred years ago by said county. treated sympathetically when in lancashire to seek cultural enlightenment. cannot pronounce the word 'cricket'. women of that county provide regular, if 'sameish' entertainment, to lancastrian men living close to the border.
a. I'm a yorkshire man!

b. Then you should leave!
by Hedley Clubnobber September 17, 2006
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care in the community

British poitical euphemism for 'piss off, we don't give a toss'. Usually applied to the disabled, elderly and infirm; a pre-requisite to depriving them of their savings and homes via low standard services. Normal to associate this with abandonment, loneliness and despair. The natural end to the industrial revolution.
Bank manager 1. 'Care in the community would be a good idea'.

Bank manager 2: 'Yes, we must tell the government to do it and sink those needy bastards'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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politician

Trickster, highwayman, mugger, pick-pocket, sexually confused, conscience-free zone; possibly male or female, but likely to be lying about about it either way. intellectually stupid but with acute animal cunning. Knows only money thus major coporate-parties are able to slit the throats of generations yet to come without concern. In Britain politicians are not so much 'elected' as 'selected'. Often associated with child molestation, prostitution, murder, swindling, refuse, robbery, violence and fund raising bingo nights, when they put on a venere of humanity. As false as the shine on Satan's wings.
Labour, Conservative & Liberal - Britian's political Unholy Trinity.

Trustworthy politician = a contradiction in terms
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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anoesis

Pronounced 'a-knee-siss':apparently means 'an emotional response to something without understanding' and could be used to describe most British social, political and cultural activity in the 21stC.
a. 'He's just trashed my country!'

b. 'Yeh, he's showing anoesis but he may also be right'
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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newcastle emlyn

Small town/village in West Wales UK, that somehow, against all the odds, remains human, friendly and welcoming. You'll hear Welsh spoken just about everywhere by locals and not just by pretentious, crachach-welsh-wannabe-shit-heads from Cardiff. Some great pubs with great real ale, all in easy staggering distance of each other; so not just mass produced crap served to chavs, that drives you mental (which we hope they will continue serving to chavs, of course).
Sheep & cattle auction right next to the main street; how cool is that? Most locals have abandoned fashion in favour of having a life. Cool hippie shops and cafs galore.
Newcastle Emlyn; lets hope the English don't ruin it.

diolch o galon
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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comp

British, sigular - short for 'comprehensive school'. State school system or chain of open prisons depending on whether you're a politician or actually live near/work in/ go to these shit holes. A process by which bright, intelligent, lively, inquisitive children are miseducated into sullen, stupid, violent, bored young adults ready for a life in front of the TV, so they can buy products for the rest of their lives until they die having accomplished....nothing.
Q. S/he's a complete moron. How did s/he get like that?

A. S/he went to a 'comp'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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