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Hedley Clubnobber's definitions

religion

usually based on selling people a personal insurance policy that can only be cashed in at death by the purchaser. therefore, impossible to know whether said religion has enough assets in the account to draw on or whether the seller has skipped off with the benefits, until too late. therefore, faith based. often accompanied by general claim to a sky-god/s authority of some kind, portrayed usually by representatives as a highly-strung, insecure person/s with a do-or-die outlook on life ie. 'you do or you die'. choice of insurers avaiable with various policy standards and disclaimers. onus upon buyer to prove worthiness rather than on sky-god. representatives arbitrate on disputes but no findings ever in favour of claimants thusfar.
religion...... the word 'ligion' said over and over again.
anyone know what a 'ligion' is?
by Hedley Clubnobber September 28, 2006
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Harvard

A place where you can pay $100k.p.a for an education you can get in any mid-west whorehouse for $50.
He's a Harvard Man therefore he is stupid and spends lots of money on his son's/daughter's miseducation. (Similar to Yale, Oxford or Cambridge institutions)
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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baghead

Term with which to affectionately chide one whose head, like a woman's handbag, contains everything and nothing all at the same time.
a. 'What are you up to now you baghead?'

b. 'I want a divorce'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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manci

pronouncewd 'man-key': dirty, filthy, grubby, grimey; derived from a person living in Manchester, UK, known to all surrounding towns as 'Mancs', and associated with the industrial revolution when everyone and everything was a stranger to soap.
a) oh, look at her/him! S/he's manci!

b) indeed, s/he does comes from south Lancashire.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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barry

A town in South Wales. Scene of an awful genetic experiment in the late 20th C, that turned everyone into a chav. Barry leaves you feeling you've just spent an hour blowing up a balloon with a hole it.
The juvenile courts do a brisk trade.
Like most Welsh Towns the locals set the tone with a fair share of 'go-lightlies' on high-carb, high-fat, plenty-of-it diets. Oblivious as to how stupid they look, a pleasant Saturday can be spent watching local salad- dodgers grazing in the run-down shopping area. (However cannot rival Caerphilly as 'Fat Central'}
High Points:
Port Road; which largely avoids the place altogether.
Barry Island; which largely avoids culture altogether.
The local chemical works; main attraction.
The docks; which in the rain look like a lowry painting .
Er....that's it.
'Barry; A Great Place To Leave'
by Hedley Clubnobber August 1, 2006
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newcastle emlyn

Small town/village in West Wales UK, that somehow, against all the odds, remains human, friendly and welcoming. You'll hear Welsh spoken just about everywhere by locals and not just by pretentious, crachach-welsh-wannabe-shit-heads from Cardiff. Some great pubs with great real ale, all in easy staggering distance of each other; so not just mass produced crap served to chavs, that drives you mental (which we hope they will continue serving to chavs, of course).
Sheep & cattle auction right next to the main street; how cool is that? Most locals have abandoned fashion in favour of having a life. Cool hippie shops and cafs galore.
Newcastle Emlyn; lets hope the English don't ruin it.

diolch o galon
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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comprehensive education

British socialist experiment (further enhanced by successive generations of hapless politicians) that forced fee paying schools out of business, raised the school leaving age and tried to give all children between 4 and 16 a basic education in several subjects. 'Basic' is about as good as it gets for most victims forced as they are into mind-numbing boredom, despair and violence. Most schools are like open, juvenile prisons. Still, American state schools make every one of 'em look like Oxford!
teenage pregnancy? routine bullying? can't read and write without the aid of 15 years further education? teacher's all suicidal? no future? no motivation? no prospects? It has to be comprehensive education!
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
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