Definitions by Hammer of Jesus
scrotumnal equinox
The rare occurrence of a pair of testicles hanging perfectly equidistant to the ground, as opposed to their regular offset position.
Tony: Bro check out my balls! Total scrotumnal equinox!
Harold: Impressive symmetry! Perfectly balanced, as all things should be.
Tony: Damn straight, now open wide homie!
Harold: Impressive symmetry! Perfectly balanced, as all things should be.
Tony: Damn straight, now open wide homie!
scrotumnal equinox by Hammer of Jesus May 29, 2020
Fumming
The simultaneous occurrence of flatulence and ejaculation. Particularly common among the elderly who have weak bowel and penile control.
Jenny: Mom! Grandpa is fumming all over the place again!
Karen: Well, grab some towels and start cleaning him up!
Jenny: Ewwwww! I don’t wanna clean up grandpa’s nasty fum! It stinks!
Karen: Shut the fuck up and clean your grandpa’s fum or you’re grounded!
Karen: Well, grab some towels and start cleaning him up!
Jenny: Ewwwww! I don’t wanna clean up grandpa’s nasty fum! It stinks!
Karen: Shut the fuck up and clean your grandpa’s fum or you’re grounded!
Fumming by Hammer of Jesus March 2, 2020
Squeech
Squeech by Hammer of Jesus February 12, 2020
heinous anus gayness
Bob: I heard Frank had to get reconstructive surgery on his asshole after spending an evening with Don.
Gerald: Just one night? Damn, there must have been seriously heinous anus gayness afoot.
Gerald: Just one night? Damn, there must have been seriously heinous anus gayness afoot.
heinous anus gayness by Hammer of Jesus August 17, 2019
BBCBT
An award-winning combination between the classic themes of Big Black Cocks and Cock and Ball Torture, resulting in a streamlined term, BBCBT.
Gerald: I heard the boys were headed to Bill’s house tonight for a chill BBCBT sesh. You down?
Tom: When the fuck have I ever said no to some dank BBCBT with the boys?!
Tom: When the fuck have I ever said no to some dank BBCBT with the boys?!
BBCBT by Hammer of Jesus July 13, 2019
Beaner executioner
A person who is professionally employed by a private or federal entity, whose job is to eliminate hispanics in large and profitable quantities.
Javier: I just nailed a Beaner executioner job with the Fed! 55k a year plus dental!
Jon: Wait, but you’re Mexican right?
Javier: So? It’s nothing personal, and the benefits are dope! Can’t wait to pop me some frijoleros!
Jon: Wait, but you’re Mexican right?
Javier: So? It’s nothing personal, and the benefits are dope! Can’t wait to pop me some frijoleros!
Beaner executioner by Hammer of Jesus May 2, 2019
penis rinser
A designated person whose job it is to rinse penis. The penis rinser may be assigned to a single, or multiple penises.
Geoff: Man, I really got it all over the place with that cumfart...we’re gonna need some tissues.
Norbert: No need, my personal penis rinser will take care of our penises.
Geoff: Wow! Thanks bro!
Norbert: No need, my personal penis rinser will take care of our penises.
Geoff: Wow! Thanks bro!
penis rinser by Hammer of Jesus April 24, 2019