Confubersion

The perplexed look of Uber customers on sidewalks staring at your car at a red light, trying to decide if you're their Uber driver or if it's a different blue Honda Accord they're supposed to get into.
The tourist couple approached the tan sedan at the red light and were reaching for the door handle of what they thought was their Uber driver's car. Hesitating to open the door, they were clearly struck with confubersion.
by Grant Rampus November 09, 2016
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Holiday tip

The dreaded tip expectation that comes during the Christmas holiday season and is expected by every service provider, from the mailman to the hair stylist. Confusion abounds on who is actually worthy of this extra tip, how much, and when the cut off date is. More specifically, there is a magical day in December (before Christmas) when there is an understanding that it’s the usual tip and one hasn’t crossed the threshold of holiday tipping. Generally thought to be December 15th.
Jimmy raced to the barber to get his haircut on December 15th, knowing that the holiday tip expectation was upon him.
by Grant Rampus December 10, 2019
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Divorried

That post-divorce phase where you're past all the bullshit of child support, new spouses, etc. and can stand your ex-spouse again.
I was surprised to see Bill actually talking to Susan in her driveway when he was picking the kids up for the weekend.

That's because Bill and Susan are divorried now.
by Grant Rampus July 24, 2016
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Wife salary

Rarely the main breadwinner in a marriage, the wife’s contribution to the household income to get a larger mortgage, fancier car, etc. Typically ranging from $30k to $45k, the wife salary also allows for smaller alimony or child support payments when the inevitable divorce happens.
When Tom met with the bank, he was able to explain why - through the wife salary - he qualified for a larger mortgage. Exact same argument when he met with the divorce attorney 2 years later, but the reverse argument in why he didn’t need to pay alimony.
by Grant Rampus September 25, 2021
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Nice blinker, asshole

A common Boston saying when driving, since no one in the city uses a blinker. This rude, yet common, driving behavior transcends all ages and gender.
"Nice blinker, asshole!" said the Bostonian as the yellow Subaru cut him off.
by Grant Rampus August 02, 2016
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Distance-in-law

The appropriate distance one must live from their in-laws so they can tolerate them. General rule of thumb is just far enough so they can't drop by unannounced.
When looking at new houses, Rick had to tactfully remind his new wife that the appropriate distance-in-law in that state was no less than 75 miles.
by Grant Rampus August 31, 2016
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Real estate developer

The chief strategist of a building project and general rapist of the land needed to "improve" the community. Cunningly masters the art of deception as he solicits investors and prepares bogus tax returns for financing the project.

An expert at filing for bankruptcy at the end of every business cycle, still manages to live in a huge house, while those residents he displaced still search for affordable housing.
The real estate developer paid homage to the historical neighborhood he razed by cladding his own 15,000 square foot mansion in brick.
by Grant Rampus July 07, 2016
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