GiddyUpGirlFL's definitions

Screwpon

The Screwpon works as a benefit contract. When involved in a sexual relationship, there are certain benefits. The Screwpon provides a multitude of advantages such as free handyman repairs, fabulous meals cooked to order, access to an amazing stocked wine cellar and "insider information" to other deals that the "screwer" might share with the "screwee." Screwpon is residual too! Old boyfriends have been known to give concert tickets and other fabulous trinkets to a past "screwee" and often times Screwpon gifts last well into future relationships thus making those items "a really good Screwpon!"

Scarlett: "Hey Maggie! Bob just offered me tickets to Keith Urban! Wanna go?"
Maggie: "Well of course! I can't believe he's offering you tickets...it's been awhile since you've dated. What a great Screwpon!"

by Giddyupgirlfl June 21, 2011

Tweener Weiner

A man that a woman uses for sex when she is between relationships. This man has no future in her life, he is a tweener weiner.

Scarlett had suffered sexual famine though she pursued a viable mate, she had been celebate for 5 months. She even became revirginated.
In a moment of lusty weakness she telephoned Maggie to say, "I am gonna do that sweet young pool boy." To that Maggie replied, "Set yourself free! He can be your tweener weiner baby!"

by GiddyUpGirlFL July 2, 2009

urban abyss

Where people go who are addicted to writing for Urban Dictionary. A veritable wasteland of right-brained people perched in front of their computers thinking about the next submission.

Lisa asked Pam, "I haven't seen Scarlett or Maggie in days. Where have they been?" Pam replied, "They have been in the urban abyss for days. Their children go unfed, they don't get showers, they don't leave the house. It's a real problem."

by GiddyUpGirlFL January 26, 2009

Milk Carton Man

Where a man goes when a woman he is dating never hears from him again. The bizarre yet common occurence when a man drops out of the woman he is dating's life without explanation.

Maggie asked Scarlett, "How's Ed?" Scarlett replied, "Girl, I think he's gone Milk Carton Man. He hasn't called. No text. No email. I haven't seen him. Nothing." Maggie commented, "Yeah,well, we'll be seeing him on the back of the milk carton for sure."

by GiddyUpGirlFL January 18, 2009

marital coma

The years spent in a bad marriage. The time which was lost in marital hell. Upon waking up out of a marital coma a woman behaves the age she was when she got married. Marital comas contribute greatly to the cougar phenomenon.

Upon waking from her 14 year marital coma, Maggie was fiercly attracted to and preyed upon the young hunky 20-somethings at the sports bar where she and her children often dined.

by GiddyUpGirlFL January 26, 2009

Land of Misfit Boys

The dating scene for women. The wasteland of broken and damaged men in which women search hoping to find a mate.

Scarlett asked Maggie, "How was last night? Did you meet anyone fun or cute?" Frustrated, Maggie replied, "No girl. We live in the Land of Misfit Boys."

by GiddyUpGirlFL January 28, 2009

smilf commune

A community where hot single moms live and raise their children with each woman contributing to the day to day needs of the commune based upon her skills, talents or profession. Helping each other in all aspects of life thus making deadbeat ex-husbands obsolete and not even worthy of being called baby daddies.

Maggie, dreaming out loud said to Scarlett, "Oh Scarlett, let's build Smilf Estates, our smilf commune. It will be Nirvana, I just know it. The Fabulous Femmes will all live and play together. Our children will have so much fun. I will be in charge of domestic affairs, cuisine and children's events. You will be in charge of wealth management, our wine cellar, fashion and finances. Pammie will manage our liquor cabinet, organize cocktail parties and dining out. Lisa will be in charge of academics and etiquette for the children. We can coordinate our dates, playmates and prowling. We shall never need or want for anything ever again."

by GiddyUpGirlFL February 1, 2009