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George McBob's definitions

horse

a device for turning money into shit and injuries.
Every Saturday afternoon, the hospital has at least 5 or 6 horse injury cases.

Oats + bran + hay + horse = very expensive shit.
by George McBob May 17, 2009
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flat dog

Look at all the flat dogs on the riverbank.

The Zambezi is infested with flatties.
by George McBob May 11, 2009
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kugel

A kugel is a special breed of rich middle-aged woman living in Johannesburg. Originally, the word kugel only applied to Jewish women (a kugel a Jewish potato-based dish), but now applies to any spoilt housewife.

Very distinctive characteristics of kugels are: A very nasal accent, calling everyone "doll", looking down on people who don't live in the Northern Suburbs, mistreating their housekeepers, spending half their lives talking on a cellphone, intense Botox treatment, wearing leopardskin patterned clothes and driving fancy 4x4s but refusing to take them offroad.

They tend to congregate at Sandton City, talk about shoes, nails and other kugels, cheat on their husbands and only tip 5%. A classic stereotypical kugel is Gwen Anderson from the South African comic strip Madam and Eve.
Kugel: Like, you know what I'm saying doll, she knows her husbands having an affair with....(25 minutes pass)... anyway, I have to like hang up doll, my nails are almost dry and I have to hurry up to get my hair done... ok doll, mwah bye.
by George McBob May 6, 2009
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bathroom wookiee

The horrible tangled mass of hair, soap scum and bodily fluids that clogs the plughole of a bath or shower.

Usually caused by women who wash their hair, shave their legs and armpits or trim their pubic hair in the shower.

If not dealt with in their early stages, they will grow, block the pipes, float around in a pool of water that spills onto the bathroom floor. and produce a clan of sentient offspring that attack you in the dead of night and drag you off into the sewers.
It takes a brave man to remove a bathroom wookiee.
by George McBob May 19, 2009
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canned hunting

An unscrupulous practice done by some Southern African safari outfits.

The owner of the outfit will arrange hunting packages with a disreputable travel agent, and give a "hunting safari" to unsuspecting overseas tourists. When the tourists arrive he awes them with campfire stories and gets them drunk on mampoer. The next day the hunt begins. The guides lead the tourists on a convoluted bundu bash around the tiny 100 hectare game farm in such a way that they think it's a lot bigger than it actually is, while pretending to track a lion. Meanwhile, the owner goes off to a game auction and buys a fleabitten, malnourished captive-bred lion. On the last day of the hunt, they finally "find" the lion (which was released from the owner's truck half an hour before). The tourists then shoot their lion, get lots of photos taken, fork out bucket-loads of cash and fly home feeling really macho.
Bystander #1 at Joburg airport:
Look at those yanks in their safari gear. Isn't it pathetic?

Bystander #2:
I bet they're on a canned hunting trip.
by George McBob April 29, 2009
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Zeroeth Law

A Zeroeth Law is a law that is added to another set of laws at a later date.

It is usually so important that the other laws cannot function without it, yet so obvious that nobody thought it needed stating.
The Zeroeth Law of thermodynamics: If objects B and C are both in thermal equilibrium with object A, then they are in thermal equilibrium with each other.

Isaac Asimov's Zeroth Law of Robotics: A robot may not harm humanity, or through inaction allow humanity to come to harm.

Newton's Zeroeth Law of Motion: If objects A and B are moving relative to object C at velocities v1 and v2, then they are moving relative to each other at velocity v3 which is the difference between v1 and v2. (Note: This law is now known not to be true, especially near the speed of light. That's where Einstein comes in)

The Zeroeth Commandment: Thou Shalt believe all of this and never question what thou art told.
by George McBob June 22, 2009
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trollplay

A form of online roleplay in which you troll your unfortunate chat partner.

The best trollplays are when you get your chat partner (usually a basement-dweller or pedophile) really worked up, and when he's just about to ejaculate into his dirty sweatpants, you drop the troll-bomb.
A chatlog from an Omegle trollplay:

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: m/f
You: f
You: u?
You: f 17 NY city
You: how about you??
Stranger: 18 m nj
Stranger: u gotta facebook
You: cool
You: uh huh
You: cybersex?
Stranger: yea sure if u want
Stranger: can i add u
You: dyou wnna start?
You: if you make me cum:D
Stranger: ok ok u gotta web came babe
You: nope make sumthng up
You: a horny story
You: with me + u
Stranger: i had this dream about u once
You: i think i had that 2
Stranger: and we were in bed cuddling each other
Stranger: and i took off your clothese and stareted sucking on those big boobs of yours
Stranger: and then i started the lick your meat it was so tender and soft
Stranger: and i ate out your ass hole
You: umm good. I moan and start to rub my breast. You nibble on my nipples.
Stranger: and the i pulled down my pants and u gave me the best blowjob ever and my dick was so wet and ur pussy to so i stuck my dick in there and u stareted screaming
You: I screamed "MY TURN, BITCH" and ripped your dick out of my ass.
Stranger: What?
You: I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH, AND WHIP OUT MY HUGE PULSATING MEMBER AND RAM IT DEEP INTO YOUR RECTUM!
Stranger: What the fuck?!? freak!!
You: I SAVAGELY RAPE YOU LIKE THE THE DISGUSTING LITTLE FAGGOT YOU ARE! I FUCK YOU UNTIL YOUR ANUS BLEEDS!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
by George McBob January 14, 2011
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