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George McBob's definitions

kugel

A kugel is a special breed of rich middle-aged woman living in Johannesburg. Originally, the word kugel only applied to Jewish women (a kugel a Jewish potato-based dish), but now applies to any spoilt housewife.

Very distinctive characteristics of kugels are: A very nasal accent, calling everyone "doll", looking down on people who don't live in the Northern Suburbs, mistreating their housekeepers, spending half their lives talking on a cellphone, intense Botox treatment, wearing leopardskin patterned clothes and driving fancy 4x4s but refusing to take them offroad.

They tend to congregate at Sandton City, talk about shoes, nails and other kugels, cheat on their husbands and only tip 5%. A classic stereotypical kugel is Gwen Anderson from the South African comic strip Madam and Eve.
Kugel: Like, you know what I'm saying doll, she knows her husbands having an affair with....(25 minutes pass)... anyway, I have to like hang up doll, my nails are almost dry and I have to hurry up to get my hair done... ok doll, mwah bye.
by George McBob May 6, 2009
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pavement special

Mongrel.

A dog with no discernible breed characteristics. Pavement specials make much better pets that pussy-ass pedigree dogs.
Steve: What breed is Bowser?
Dave: Pavement special.
by George McBob April 29, 2009
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goef

v. to smoke weed.

S. Afr. slang, pronounced "goof"


To be goefed is to be stoned out of your bracket.
Mike went outside to have a goef.

I'm going get lekker goefed tonignt, bru.
by George McBob April 28, 2009
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Telkom

After the ANC, Telkom is South Africa's largest crime syndicate.

Their modus operandi is to force other companies into selling their products for them under duress, extort ungodly fees out of their customers, particularly on ADSL lines, with broadband prices 10 times or more than overseas, and up to 100 times more on leased lines.

They resort to thuggery and intimidation such as sending technicians to disconnect you for no reason, charging you for non-existent calls and unexplained tariffs and staffing their call centres with retarded unionised sociopaths.

Their main partners in crime are Eskom and Sasol.
It's a proven fact that if you fly 1st class to Hong Kong, stay in a 5 star hotel, buy a laptop, download 100GB onto it and fly back, it will be both QUICKER and CHEAPER than if you stayed in SA and downloaded it on a Telkom line.
by George McBob May 21, 2009
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Capetonian

Welcome home, Capetonians!
by George McBob August 24, 2009
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McFreedom

McFreedom is the cheap, hollow imitation of liberation that America somehow feels entitled to push upon countries around the world.

The McFreedom process begins with threats and intimidation to the leader of the victim nation followed by increasingly random and impossible ultimatums. If they don't give in, the American military arrives with their tanks and bombs and starts demolishing the place, all the while handing out junk food and pamphlets to the civilians.

Soon, a new leader who's policy is by extreme coincidence exactly the same as the yank's is "elected by the free people". Within months, McDonalds chains have started to infest the countryside and foreign investors suddenly own all of the country's natural resources.

Anyone who doesn't wax lyrical about how much better things are now is labelled a terrorist and shot.
We've changed your regime! Thanks for the oil, enjoy your McFreedom!
by George McBob May 25, 2009
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bush cat

Namibian slang for nigger.

It comes from the phrase "you can take the kaffir out of the bush, but you can't take the bush out of the kaffir"
Don't go down that street. There's a whole lot of bush cats down there.
by George McBob May 11, 2009
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