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FunkyBumpkin's definitions

Jink

1) A term for the child of a Jewish-East Asian mating, based on "Jew" and "dink" (where "dink" refers to the racial epithet that was semi-popular for racist purposes circa the Vietnam era). However, whether this term is perceived as a racist insult, or merely a lively description, varies depending on context, intent, etc.

2) An exceptionally cheap, tightwad Asian. So termed for the disparaging association with stereotypical Jewish fiscal behavior, coupled with the previously mentioned "dink".
1) Did you see that Jink girl they call Yo-yo last night? She was smokin! I love those interracial honeys!

2) Did you see the way ol' Mr. Nguyen jewed 'em down on that coffee table at the flea market? Tony's dad is such a fuckin' Jink!!
by FunkyBumpkin April 28, 2005
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gynophobe

1) one who is afraid of women. (this may mutate into outright misogyny if left untreated. An excellent remedy is for a considerate, reasonably sexy, sexually enthusiastic woman to fuck the gynophobe's brains out.)
2) a repressed woman afraid of her own vulva and/or sexuality.
3) an otherwise straight man who is too much of a pussy to perform cunnilingus.

See also: nice guy, prude, double standard, Republican, gangsta.
1) That Joe guy seems pretty nice, but he needs to get laid for all our sakes, he is such a gynophobe!
2) The gynophobes were out in force at the Ladies Bible Study Group.
3) Their sex-life progressing nicely, Alex & Tina bought some Tangerines & Cream lube at the "toy store" to slather on her yoni and get him past his inner gynophobe as he lapped it up that night.
by FunkyBumpkin April 29, 2005
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nice guy

A term used by a female for a male she does not find sexually interesting.

See also: friend or just a friend
One of life's great mysteries is how women can simultaneously complain about inconsiderate man-whores and the impossibility of finding a "nice guy", while sitting across from a hetero male friend who also has similar male friends that she has met but declined to date.
by FunkyBumpkin April 29, 2005
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extreme sports

Highly over-publicized activities that at least half the time are undertaken or discussed by otherwise boring people in a desperate attempt to seem interesting. Posers are extraordinarily abundant, especially inThe Heartland. After all, how the hell does some kid in Nebraska go surfing, or rock-climbing in Iowa?
The purchased experiences of white-water rafting and bungee jumping gave Ned a sense that he was not a vanilla, SUV-driving corporate automaton, but a wild and crazy alpha-male living his life on the edge!
by FunkyBumpkin April 29, 2005
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swattage

adj.: excellent.
The most exteme form of or epitome of what is being described in a favorable, enthusiastic manner. See also: killer, bomb, phat, tight, the sh!t, etc.
Dude, did you see that f*ckin' sword fight at the end of Kill Bill? That was SWATTAGE!
by FunkyBumpkin April 28, 2005
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Well done

In culinary circles, an ironic term for red meat which has been drastically overcooked, destroying all or most of its flavor and rendering a toughness and texture akin to that of shoe leather.

ORIGINS: In fact, during the Great Depression, many restaurants and diners were unable to purchase enough beef, and began sneaking out at night to carve slices out of the uppers of the shoes & boots of bums sleeping in their doorways. This material was then soaked in a brine for several days, strained, and thrown on the grill just for any customers whose order specified their meat be cooked "fully through, till grey and thoroughly well done". As the most available brand of boots at the time were embossed with their maker's name, "Wellington", some experts believe the term well-done was simply a mistaken attempt to order some more of what the patron believed to be a famous "Wellington" brand steak. Since purchase of a brand name product in those days was associated with wealth and refinement, it is likely that in the early days, those ordering the "Wellington" steaks did so purely as an attempt to one-up their fellows or announce their status, despite its inferior pallatability when compared with less prestigious, non-branded steaks. Over time, the misguided confusion between a Wellington, a well-done, and displays of status became permanently lodged in the culture so that the destruction of otherwise good meat by this pauper's cooking method still persists to this very day.

Other scholars believe this term, or its equivalent, originated when an ancient cave-chef, totally inept at grilling meat, yet trying to get some (insert your favorite euphemism here) from a sexy naive young cave temptress, tried to hide his ineptitude and utter desicration of a choice cut of buffalo or whatever the hell they ate, by responding to her complaints about the meat's dryness and lack of flavor by saying, "You said you liked it cooked well. This is well-done. It is rare to get a steak that can safely be consumed with the center bloody and pinkish-red, and I didn't want you to get food poisoning." Cave languages being somewhat less verbally sophisticated, however, this would probably sound to the modern ear more like "unga bunga", accompanied by various gestures, snorts, and other ape-like movements.
"Isn't it funny how a steak that's well-done is anything but done well?"
by FunkyBumpkin April 29, 2005
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Man DeLay

A male organ de-sensitizer that is the only way that piece of shit Tom DeLay can keep from jizzing himself anytime he contemplates his pact with Satan.

See also: Tom DeLay
In exchange for a soul, Tom DeLay chose a corrupt power grab and a case of "Man DeLay" to subdue his raging hard-on for Terri Schiavo, the only "living" woman who didn't threaten his fragile sense of masculinity with things like thought, speech, or any signs of being a human being rather than a baby-making factory with no right even to accurate information about contraception, let alone control over her own body and its reproductive organs.
by FunkyBumpkin April 29, 2005
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